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Got myself feeling a little gloomy lately, think it's all that jazz music I've been trying to listen to! So in this sort of situation the best thing to do is to reach for your favourite album.
It's always difficult to pick a favourite, so many to choose from. But this one beats all the rest for me.
It's a 1973 album by Ronnie Dyson and it's called "One Man Band". I adore this man's voice and I love all 10 tracks.
If I have to pick a favourite song it is "I Think...
Inanna was a Mesopotamian goddess who descended into the Underworld to rescue someone. I forget who, perhaps her husband? At some point she performs a striptease, culminating in her own skin, flesh, bone and then she escapes, survives, is triumphant!
Its the classic tale of an ordeal that is character-building; exactly as I expect this little episode to be.
Fears to be faced! I'm so vain, so private, such a recluse, such a coward!
I dare not even read any advice on the treatment I'll receive...
I found a lump one afternoon, about a month ago. I saw my GP, she referred me to the local hospital, I was told I definitely had breast cancer this morning.
Isn't it curious how calm I feel whilst simultaneously feeling a sense of rising terror?!
I'm like one of those prey animals who drop limply when they feel the tiger's jaw around their neck.
My preoccupations now are:
And finally some sign of improvement. Still a long way from normal but getting there.
Sometimes forget what normal is/was. But I know I'm in good company here with that one.
Hubby has been much more upbeat in the last few days and bowel movements seem to be reverting to pre diagnosis state. He is now brave enough to pass the occasional burst of wind (or fart to us uncouth commoners). Toilet movements are firming up too and showing a little more depth of colour. The paleness and looseness is...
I found my voice through treatment. I found my voice because it was solicited and respected and valued and deemed important. Because others thought my voice was important I came to believe it to be so.
I'm told I had a rough time through treatment but with nothing to compare it to what would I know. I am here, I am alive and now having a tougher time surviving. I don't really know why, I did not know what to expect, I have nothing to compare it to....................except that I do to a degree...
Well that was bound to happen! I should have known better really. If anybody got their hands on a diary from my teen years it would have sounded like I was seriously depressed but that is because the diary only got written in when I was down. When I was out and about, having the best kind of fun then there was no time to write a "stupid diary."
So here it is with the blog, when I am busy and battling on there is no time to write. When I am having fun and getting enough rest there is no...
I was diagnosed last week and have done a lot of pacing and a fair amount of melodrama has been performed since then.
Obviously I'm not going to die, yet I tell my friend I want Rammstein to carry my coffin. I wonder if people will buy me presents, and if it would be rude to drop hints.
I wonder if I might faint with fright or throw up; yet I reassure everyone that I feel absolutely fine.
This is going to be a secret journal.
Somebody suggested I gave jazz music a try. Unfortunately I have only found two jazz albums in my vast music collection. "Sketches Of Spain" by Miles Davis and "Collected" by Terry Callier. I have been listening to both of them, but it became a bit of a struggle. I do like "Sketches Of Spain" but I think it needs to be listened to carefully in one go. It is definitely no good for the MP3 player which I listen to whilst travelling with regular interruptions. I have also...
I was diagnosed in December of 2011 with a tumour in my bowel. My symptoms leading up to it and diagnosis (or misdiagnosis) could be classed as 'interesting'.
Late in 2010 I took a friend's dog for a walk on the Dunstable downs. The job I held at the time had a component of it which meant I tended to walk a minimum of 11 or 12 miles each day, so I was fairly fit.
On the fateful day I took the dog for a walk with my wife, I walked up a small incline and by the time I got to the top ...
