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Had cytoscopy last week, cancer back again. This is the third time. I know have to see another specialist about surgery as all different treatments have not worked. I am in shock as I knew what way it was heading but now it looks like its here I am petrified. Ive done 18 months of treatments for nothing. I feel so sorry for myself (big baby) I think I need a kick up the backside telling me Im lucky Im still here, but at the moment it doesnt feel like it. I know it means I should be cancer free after...
I wanted to write a diary at the start of my journey but I never made the time and then whilst I was having my treatment I often did not have the energy. I have longed to just be able to get what is rolling around in my head out of it so I can think about something else and return to it later if I want to.
I have read a few blogs and thought to myself I need to do that so here goes!!
Had my MRI scan to review my progress 3 months post treatment and had the appointment to get the results last week...
steve passed away yesterday at 18.10 sudden but peacefully RIP thanks for all support
It will be a month on Friday since you left us. It will also be Rebecca's 16th birthday that day. We will try to make it as special as possible for her whilst also remembering you. She misses you so much, she tries to be brave in front of her friends at school, but at home, late at night I hear her crying for you. I was so proud of her, reading at your funeral, I hope you were proud of her too.
Dad is coping, just........ There was a power cut the other day, it took him an hour to work out how...
I have been staying with my mum and dad but went home on friday as I hadnt seen my kids and husband. The marie curie nurse was staying so I thought it would be ok. But mum phoned me and said dad was very distressed so I came back and spent the night. He spoke to me and said he felt funny and he was going to die. It was a horrible night as I kept watching him. I spoke to the marie curie nurse and she said people sence thing even if its not that day they know the time is near. He is very adgitated...
steve has gone downhill over weekend. nurse bakc tomorrow to put up syringe driver. and catheter, it is so horri ble to watch you love on fading way. only having sips of water now. very restless, not sleeping much. i just hope he goes peacefully.
Hi everyone
Unfortunately I have another infection. went to gp on thursday after work and he has put me on co-amoxyclav and also metrosa gel for in the wound.
photos 1 is saturday and photo 2 is today
still feeling under the weather and there is pain, redness and heat coming off the wound.
hope everyone is ok....
peter
SATURDAY
SUNDAY
hiya all
not posted for a while... dont know why...think it was coz we were just dealin with it all ourselves and just sorta got on with it! well trev eventually finished his chemo cycles.....3 cycles....one week hooked up 24/7 for 5 days.....2 weeks off then start agen. did realy well....first cyle he breezed thru...tumour began to shrink immediately....second cycle...again really good but caught a sickness bug which floored him for a week..but agen bounced back....held onto his hair til the eve...
It's been a bit up and down in the past few days. I think I had been doing very well since coming home, but somewhere along the way I overdid things. On Friday I was looking pale, feeling cold, needing extra rests again and in more pain than for some time. I guess it wasn't a good idea to try and start reducing the pain killers I was taking but I had been feeling reasonably well up until that point. Especially after the stitches had been taken out from round the stoma as they were painful and pulling...
I started a blog online before I new of this site so I will post it here instead of re-writing it all again. I did it for family so they could see what is going on instead of having to repeat myself over and over and live every moment.
http://her2-negative.blogspot.com/
Ill write here from now on too and hopefully people will see we are all in the same boat
