It's been a bit up and down in the past few days. I think I had been doing very well since coming home, but somewhere along the way I overdid things. On Friday I was looking pale, feeling cold, needing extra rests again and in more pain than for some time. I guess it wasn't a good idea to try and start reducing the pain killers I was taking but I had been feeling reasonably well up until that point. Especially after the stitches had been taken out from round the stoma as they were painful and pulling the night before they were removed.
Now I am not sure how much to try and do. I want to build up what I manage day by day but don't want to set myself back. And it is hard to 'listen to what your body tells you' when you take sufficient pain killers to stop it hurting.
Anyway, this blog post isn't meant to sound as though I'm really struggling. I think I am still emotionally strong and not doing too badly over all.
And there was good news on Thursday, when the specialist nurse rang to say my results had come back: tumour was removed with good margins (I should think so too with the amount of tissue taken away!), and that out of 14 lymph nodes removed and analysed, only one was showing signs of cancer. Before the radiotherapy in the summer there were at least three or four lymph nodes visible in the MRI scan, suggesting they were affected. A good result then and likely that I am now cancer free (we hope anyway). Follow up chemo will be on the cards to make sure nothing microscopic is still circulating trying to take hold, but then that should be it. Yay.
I see the surgeon to hear all that officially and to get wounds checked, etc. That should be reassuring, and I hope for some more guidance on what I can realistically expect to do at the different stages of recovery.
Thanks again for messages, gifts, help with childcare, etc that have continued to sustain us.
Love and best wishes.
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