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I woke this morning and all I can feel is guilty and sorry.
Guilty because my husband was dying and I couldn't even tell. I know he was ill and I knew he was getting worse, but I didn't know he was dying. I didn't support him like I would have felt shit and I thought it would all get better and he was being a little lazy (at first anyway). He kept saying sorry, he hadn't done the house work etc but he had just slept in. I thought he had got into bad habbits being out of work.
I...
well its nearly monday not long to go now till i will be taking part in my first lot of clinical trials ooohhhhh im not looking forward to this at all, having my chemo while im in there too....so gathering im not going to be coming out in a great state!!
On monday im having a line fitted into my chest they are putting me under for this and then start on these clinical trials eeeeekkkkkkk.
My mummys coming with me though ha ha shes a good en she really is, even went and bought some new pjs for...
Last night I had a dream that you had really left me Dad,
In this dream I begged you to please not ever forget me
I’ll tell you how it began, so this is how it starts
You sat on my bed with tears in your eyes and your hand over my heart
You asked me what I was thinking about, at the same time I asked why you were crying
You looked at me and said The doctor says I’m dying
I asked you what you meant and how this could really be
how cold anyone take you away from me
I said NO, this isn’t real...
I found a penny today and remembered this, it made me smile again, i can picture my dad reciting this once when i found a penny on the path.
(God how i wish i could be that happy little girl again if only for a few moments)
I found a penny today
just laying on the ground,
but it's not just a penny
this little coin i've found.
Found pennies come from heaven
that's what my dad told me,
He said the angels toss them down
Oh, how i loved that story.
He said when an angel misses...
Hi
not a good result....positive for COLIFORM ANAEROBES AND STAPHYLOCOCCUS AUREUS have been prescribed 3 antibiotics.. CIPROFLOCACIN FLUCLOXACILLIN AND METRONIDAZOLE..also given another 200 co-codomol as i am going through 8 a day and also a box of inodine as this was used at the walk in centre last sunday and seems to be... doing some good in the wound..other than that no problems!!!
have a good weekend
peter
Hi, I have never blogged or joined a forum before but read posts here and felt compelled to join in so I would not feel so lonely. My partner of 25 years has just been diagnosed 3 weeks ago with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma and is currently in hospital. Sorry if this is not the right place to say all this, but I wanted to join in with you all as your comments and posts have comforted me.
I'm somewhat concerned about my reaction to Mum's passing. Since it happened on Tuesday, I have been relatively calm. A friend of mine picked this up today when I spoke to him on the telephone. When my mum passed away on Tuesday, it did hit me. Since then, I have felt something missing inside and I have felt different in some way. But I have hardly cried about it. I know different people react in different ways, but my reaction to it has surprised me. In general, I am a very calm person...
thought i wud give an update...before my head explodes!!!!
16th september .......another hospital appointment with oncologist. he went over all the history to the onset of trev s cancer...all the way back. then he went over what had happened reg the peg and trachy. told us that the cancer is in tonsil and lymph node in neck..large one!!! also then sed its at back of tongue because of the location of the tonsil. i didnt expect that!!! hadnt been mentioned before. the doc went on to say they had decided...
hey guys , i last heard from carol about 10am, she said to say hi to you all, typical carol thinking of everyone else, thats why she is so loved on here , i wasnt sure whether to write this but i know it would have helped me greatly in those last few hours of julians life but most off all in the following few weeks when i was feeling so lost and lonely and sad , my heart is breaking for carol and the only thing any of us can do for them now is to be their, im just hoping and praying for peace and...
