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Dad hasn't eaten for five days now. He is only having drinks. He's got a syringe driver and he is only accepting pain relief. he doesn't want anything which will prolong his life.
It's heartbreaking to see him like this and I have to fight back tears every time i say goodbye to him. he just wants to be with Mam now and I wish there was a way we could help him.
As the last post said, I felt pretty down last week. I felt better nearer the end of the week and feel back to my old self now.
I do think being off for so long will be difficult though, but I have gone to a tai chi class which I enjoyed and will attend that as often as I feel fit enough and obviously at the right end of the month due to low immune system etc.
As for how I feel physically I feel very well, back to, if I didn't know I had this condition...
The perils of getting too smug, of thinking maybe you're getting somewhere, maybe moving forwards......
Just when I was thinking, Hey, I've achieved a fair bit and maybe there is a reason to plod on..... just when I think I can do this living on my own bit, and I'm going to give things a go, and I'm pretty amazing........ And look at all the stuff I've done so far (though I wonder how), and it really is different from a few months ago etc etc.....
So, today, a lunch with some...
The lady who works at the train station I go to London from for my radiotherapy everyday noticed that I was a regular and (because of my action man hair probably guessed my condition) told me how I could save a third on my rail ticket everyday by applying for a railcard, she has saved me over £50 on the cost of the travel for this treatment alone, what a lovely lady she was and how nice of her to actually notice me and take the time to help me.
On the way back from London I was sitting on the...
So have not been on for a bit. Just so dang tired.
His chemo is going well. 3rd Oxaliplatin today. Was a later sitting so had time for 2nd breakfast. Took hot cordial drink which really seemed to help when the throat convulsion effect kicked in. We figure that the drip lowers core body temperature so adding warmed drink might help reverse the chill effect. So far so good. Think they speeded up the rate of the drip? Fairly sure it was 450 last time and was definitely 500 this time. For sure it was...
10 years ago my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. We were told every few months for 10 years that she was close to death. 10 years, 2 rounds of chemotherapy and radiotherapy and 2 major surgeries later and mum is still here and hopefully now clear. In the midst of it all I had quite a severe eating disorder; retrospectively I was trying to gain control of my life as the uncertainty in the situation with mum meant that I was desperately anxious and depressed. I had CBT for my eating...
Had to get the doctor out again for Dad. He is so confused, not knowing what he is doing or why. He was a bit more chatty today but not any real conversation. He has been prescribed something to stop his agitation and to help him get a good nights sleep.
One of the carers was in the room when doctor came and I know she looks after Dad, but I think she has too much input into things that don't concern her. She was the one who rang up to get them to take the bed away after Mam passed away without...
As I said in previous posts, I was advised not to work due to the environment I work in. It's starting to get to me now. I felt ok whilst Gail was off work even when it was due to her being unwell (flu). She went back to work on Monday and I have felt worse as each day passes, I don't know how I'll manage this for six months. I have never been off work in 37 years. I have been doing all the wee jobs that need done, worked in the garden, baked etc etc, but I feel myself getting...
