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Just had a fantastic phone call from a friend from work, the thought of going back to work has been playing on my mind and with the new term starting next week I am dreading walking through the doors. I know that everyone will be supportive and concerned, but it is this concern that worries me, I will find the sympathy and people's fear of saying the wring thing a struggle. I am still me all be it on my own, I still want to work, do things and be who I am yet I know people will be worried about upsetting...
Well we are nearly there, I am booked into hospital for a Vaginal hysterectomy on Friday 26th August.
Today Tuesday 23rd I have my pre appointment, its all becoming to real.
Telephone call received yesterday from the main man's secretary..
My standing and importance has obviously improved as usually I'm notified by post that my appointment 'at the clinic of' is at a date a couple of weeks in the future.
''Mr.Main Man would like to see you on Wednesday''
Appointment made so tomorrow is my 'This is your life' day!'
Firstly let me say for those out there who are not well enough or able to eat i am sorry and mean to cause no offense.With my chemo ctd the steroids are having a great time like a ticking bomb in my mind saying what shall i eat next. Half way through one meal and my mind is already thinking of the next or what treat i deserve for eating the last. My specialist nurse said i should treat my meals like medicine and even if i don,t fancy them to sit 3 times aday and eat a little. Well if i carry on like...
2005 hubby had surgery to correct abdominal aortic aneurysm. Two years recouperation, then diagnosed oesophageal cancer (where meets stomach) in 2009. At first had pre-op chemo only to be told one week before surgery that tests showed his heart wouldn't withstand it. So (only other option) January 2010 started intensive inpatient course (24 hrs a day) of combined chemo/radio. Gastroscopy July 2nd showed done well. He had a really positive attitude. Then July 4 collapsed with what was thought...
Well the weekend away held a range of emotions.
Betral~ it felt like a huge betral to be leaving for the weekend without him. I knew that I needed to go to be with my daughter and to let my son have a little time to relax and also give myself time to try and learn how to sleep and most importantly give my children their mum back.
Guilt ~ Should I be laughing and giggling? Should I be smiling and having fun? Should I be happy? Yes I know that he would want me to be all those things but the sense...
Well after the talk with the Drs on Thursday they kept to the bargain and allowed mum home :)
She is unfortunately suffering with nausea. Don't know if its from the meds, tiredness or calcium count in the blood (probably abit of all 3). She is keeping stubborn about the build up drinks and refusing to have them, for now I am letting it go, well for a couple more days anyway. I am going to try again soon to change her mind because 600 calories a day (and not always that when she is being sick...
Julie would have been 53 today.
It should have been the 36th time I was to say Happy Birthday Darling.
To take my mind off the day I spent the weekend with my sister and her Partner in a cottage in Wales. My mind was diverted and the day has passed without major trauma.
Leon collected Julie's mum and took 5kg of ashes to spread over her fathers grave. Mum is now happy that Julie is at rest on Holy ground and in a place that she can visit.
I am a little dissapointed in myself that I don't...
Its now finally hit me after 2 years that I am fighting this Cancer. Had a 3rd reoccurence in April this year, went straight onto Sutent after 6 weeks scan showwed shrinkage to mets in Liver & remaining Kidney, so stayed on it a further 3 Months, tough side effects etc.
Scan on Friday after 3 months showed minor disease progression, it really sucks now!
Got to look at my 5 year old & be myself knowing that I am not going to be around to see her be an adult unless I can find something that is...
Well Nige has had his transplant and so far so good !!!!!!!!! I was absoulutely dreading it 4-6 weeks in Jimmys all the travelling back and forth every day and the fact that Nige would be so ill !!!!!!!! Nige coped really well indeed only had three really bad days which he slept through most of it , he did have the runs for a week but thats normal just the chemo doing its job !!!!! and low and behold 20 days later they let him come home which was actually only 13 days post stem cells to say we wre...
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