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This Friday is when my husband starts Round 2 of his two-drug chemotherapy. It has been just great whilst he has had two weeks off, no bottle hanging around his waist to disturb his sleep and both his strength and sleeping patterns have improved.
I am not sure if the second round is worse or better than the first. I feel he has been quite lucky because although he has lost his hair and suffered from some nausea and tiredness, he seems to have fared better than many people I know when they have gone...
One thing I realised when I read my blogs back is how I did not recognise the overwhelming support I have had from friends, family and people I didn’t even know that well.
Support has come not just from those closest to me but a random colleague who has stopped me and said I heard what happened, I am so sorry and asked me how I am, offered support and said that they really meant it, they weren’t just saying it and I honestly believe they did!
Also the fabulous practical support, one...
An apology in advance as this is a bit of a rant. It would help to know if anyone else is experiencing this or anything similar.
I am experiencing a lot of opinions from colleagues and some friends about grief.
“I don’t know how you do it (in relation to me working, going out, speaking to people, leaving the house) if I was you I would never go to work/leave the house again.”
“How are you not more of a mess?” “Why have I never seen you cry?”
This I think...
I feel like i should be appologising for something, Iv been poorly and low for a few days now, And no-matter how many people i talk to about it, i still feel the same way.
It's horrible to say this, But i wish it wasnt my mum who got ill, I obviously dont wish this awful illness on anybody, But the scare that it may return is eating me away, And i cant seem to live for today!!
I mean - Im 18! I should be out living my life, Having fun. Instead im coped up at home in my room, Hiding away,...
So anyway Picko was off for his radiotherapy pre-checks so I thought I would go with him and take a trip down memory lane. Except it wasn’t. A trip down memory lane that is. When I had my radio it was in the old suite and Picko is in the new purpose built radiotherapy suite. My radiotherapy was via a steam driven LINAC (I swear I could hear those girls shovelling coal on while the LINAC did its best.) My slogan was LINAC TWO are my favourite crew. But then LINAC TWO went on maintenance so I was on...
I went to see Mo today at the Hospice early,about 10am Sue came with me as she wanted to pop into the clothes sale St Michaels was having today.My mum was also going to see Mo too from 10-11am and decided to go with Sue and have a nose while I stayed with Mo.She's not looking too clever today with this yellow tint in her eyes from an infection she seems to have picked up,these things happen especially with Mo's immune system being so weak.The doctors are giving Mo antibiotics to try and clear up...
Mo arrived at the Hospice with my mum,way before I eventually turned up as I had been held up in traffic because of roadworks,had to be today of all days!!.Mo was taken onto a ward and settled down they were serving lunch at the time and brought her some in,some soup and some type of mousse dessert I tried her with the soup and she actually had it.After the soup,I thought as Mo seemed hungry I tried to give her the mousse,but she didn't seem interested so I went back out to the car to get her clothes...
Mo was due to be transferred to St Michaels Hospice today,Paul and I aren't too happy about it but it needs to be done.I rang the Hospice at Home nurses because I wasn't to sure whether they were involved with the transfer or not. It turns out they don't its usually dealt with the Hospice doctors I think. An ambulance did turn up about 10ish but there was some breakdown in communication as they were under the impression Mo could go in a chair,as if.I did explain it would have to be by stretcher because...
It has been a month since my dear Hubby drew his last breath, and cancer gained another victory :-(
I am missing him very much.
Silly little things, like telling him about something that happened, or getting him to help fill in forms (which I wouldn't need to be doing anyway if he hadn't have gone - but thats beside the point) paperwork was never my strong point, mind you nor was housework!
Also having someone else there to back you up with the kids when they don't do as they are told...
Chapter Two.
I'll say something here. I'm not scared of a lot. I don't scream when there's a spider in the bath, and I'm not particularly worried by sharks or anything melodramatic. But, there are two things in this world I honestly loathe beyond reason. Wasps, because they're evil little buggers, and hypodermic needles (or any generally sharp, pointy object aimed at me).
I'll just skip over getting to the hospital, as for some reason the GP gave us the...
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