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Originally published 29/4/13
Today has been a day of good and bad. Histology was in for my checkup with my consultant.
Good
I am, on paper at least, cancer free. The surgery worked, none of the tumour was left behind in my tongue and they had some margin of healthy tissue all round. Of eighty lymph nodes removed from my neck, only four showed signs of cancer.
It has been caught in time.
Bad
The margins on part of the dissection of my tongue were too small, half a millimetre, to be entirely safe. Its...
Originally published 28/4/13
Today has been a nice quiet day, the sort of Sunday that seems to last for ever. Trouble is, it's not quiet for everyone. My poor missus has been busy, more so because I can't do as much as before.
It makes me feel damned useless, simply because my instincts are telling me that it should be me looking after her. Its not though, the damned cancer has made sure of that. I hate it for that, something else its taken from me. That's the worst part for me I think, the...
Originally published 27/4/13
Early entry today, its Saturday and Doctor Who night, so the whole family will be sitting down to enjoy Saturday evening who.
Today I have been sooo tired. Before you say it, yes obviously I totally over did it yesterday. Ho hum. Lesson learned? Probably not. Trouble is, I get tired like this and I get grumpy. I have been snappy with my lovely missus, to my burning shame I upset her this morning. I have shouted at the kids. Oh dear.
My wife thinks I'm not getting enough...
Originally published 26/4/13
My fight to get back to normality continues, I think I had a bit more success with it today though.
I went for a walk in the rain this morning, picked up a couple of bits at the local shop in the village and wandered back. I think this left me less tired than yesterday - honestly, I fail to understand why things that not three weeks ago I did all the time without getting tired or feeling a bit I'll are suddenly so damned hard. Walking up stairs without getting out of...
Originally published 25/4/13
Its been a nice day today, I went for a walk into the village and back in the sunshine - which was only slightly misconceived, I came back with a pleasant feeling of warm accomplishment which only later translated into a need to have a nap from sheer tiredness.
Today I have been mostly just trying to get back into a routine, doing odd little jobs like taking all my pre-operation pain medication back to the chemists (I'm not taking any pain control now, which compared...
Originally published 24/4/13
Finally. Made it home, over two weeks in hospital and finally I'm back.
Feels really good to be back, but I would like to take a moment to extol the people who cared for me in the hospital. They are the very best of people, if you ask me, working tirelessly to meet the needs of patients under their care. I don't care what anyone else says now, the NHS is worth every single penny that is spent on it if it filled with people such as these. The level of care and compassion...
Originally published 23/4/13
Hopefully this is the last entry to my diary from a hospital room, I am heartily sick of this place now - the doctors and nurses, in fact all the staff on ward, have been wonderful - friendly, helpful, caring, nice, attentive. In fact I think these people epitomise what is right about the NHS, in fact what is right about people in general. It's safe to say that rather a lot of my faith in humanity has been restored. If there is anywhere that you can see just how
...Originally published 22/4/13
Speech and language saw me today for the first time, not much help really, I've had enough of "you're doing so well on your own" and to be honest it feels a bit like I'm the only one that's trying here.
Once again, I have to be patient, let things heal and then the work can start. I guess this is fair enough, but I really want to get back to my old self now not in six months time.
I do wonder how close I will get, how long it will take for me to...
Originally published 21/4/13
My recovery from that massive operation continues, I find I can cope with the purée food better and generally I am feeling more like my old self.
Speech is a worry, I slur and slurp my way through speech, often having to repeat myself. Everyone says my speech is coming along well, but as usual that's not enough for me. In my head I understand that the cancer has taken my old voice, my heart just wants me to be the same as before.
The other worry is, have we...
Originally published 21/4/13
Where to start? Perhaps a summary of events today;
Kids came to visit
Feeding tube "lost" by consultant
Clips out
Stitches out
All but 1 dressing removed
Managed to escape (with consultants blessing) outside of hospital for an hour!
Woah, I mean, Woah what's been the highlight? Has to be the kids, first time they visited is still had drains and feeding tube and looked rather like Frankenstein when I walked.
The teenager (you know who you are!) Has been up often...
