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My Danny died early this morning. He hung on as long as he could and fought so hard to stay with me. I am lost without him.
A BIG thankyou to all who answered my blog Guilty.
It is true there is alot of love on this site and I definitely feel it this past 24 hours.
I haven't yet spoken to my mum, members of my family were present and witnessed the argument, I spent last night on my own, no-one rang me to see how I was, my distress and heartache obviously went unnoticed by my sisters. I still feel guilty about the incident but it is not an isolated case I have spent my life feeling guilty about my mum.
Guilty b...
We are going into day 41 since Bert started his Chemo (it lasted 5 days) and his counts are beginning to creep up, albeit very slowly. he had another couple of units of blood last night so I am hoping to see an improvement today when I visit.
As far as I can gather as they keep changing things he now needs more cheme as it is about 6 weeks away before he goes for transplant. However he can't get his week at home until his counts go up more, then he has to have the chemo and then he has to wait for...
I think it has finally hit me.
My gorgeous husband Sam was diagnosed with soft tissue sarcoma in 2006 after having a lump removed from his thigh that he had had for as long as he could remember. We first met in 2003 in Glasgow where we were on a course together. We both worked for the same organisation. I am a Welfare Officer and sitting in the bar on our first night he told me that his son had died due to cancer, aged 9, the previous September. My heart went out to him and we spent most of that...
Have to be honest - every day is good since perhaps beginning of March. Last year was horrible - walking 10 paces left me struggling for breath - then I was diagnosed which was even worse. And then ... the treatment started.
Well we went to the appointment at the pain clinic. It seems his liver is now playing up his blood tests showed up something, they are going to re-do the test next week then act. It doesnt help that dad has so much complications they are limited with what they can do for him, the steroids did not work so they have been stopped. There is definately something different about dad just now, I think that the heart may be willing but the body is now saying no.
I feel so terriby upset. I have just upset my poor 82 year old mum by shouting at her and telling her that she doesn't care about me. That she worries that her 87 year old sister is going to die, that my sisters ulcerative colitis is bad, that my brother is hard of hearing and lives alone. That the neighbour next door is going blind and he lives alone. That my brothers daughter has learning difficulties. My mum might be 82 but she is fit she works 4 days a week 8 hours a day in my brothers fruit...
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