Woke up really early hours, 01.15 after some unsettled sleep before that. Physically felt horrible and then boom an emotional burst. I felt intensely sad and grief struck. I am through the burst which lasted a good hour, then tapered down and then feeling quite grounded again. Feel somewhat drained by it but through it.
It's now passed 4 and meds are kicking in, I also have coffee, I am comfy sitting up. Getting up and getting to the back door on wobbly legs was worth it. It is cold and clear sky. I enjoyed the blast of cold and plenty of stars. Brilliant.
I am looking forward to today, Dana is here, there are no appointments, it looks to be a decent Autumn day.
I am also feeling a bit whingy so am getting these out here. I was hoping that my new debit card would be here by now, it's not and it is making me cross. While Jeff can order stuff for me, I need essential stuff and that someone has taken my independence from me makes me livid.
What particularly smarts I need to order my private meds that I am dependent on for my quality of life. I am not running out low but not comfortably in advance. This has been compounded by supply chain issues with my brand of oil which made me anxious. Resolved by a change in prescription for another one, slightly lower strength so titrate up. Same price though.
The arthritic flare in my arms is much reduced , my right elbow though is sometimes throwing daggers. My back hurts from immobility and the scarring. I am also getting itchy. Today though I will have the strength for a little soak in the bath. I can only sit in it but it will ease my muscles and my skin will feel better for the double base soak and it gives me an all round boost.
Writing down my whinges has got them out, equally writing about how I am going to be feeling better as the day goes on has made me feel connected to those points so helpful.
I hope you have a good day for you,
