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Thursday 14th Jan 22.41 pm
Have been told today after only a week of being diagnosed that next friday am having surgery to remove my cancer from my breast! This is all so surreal, can't believe really happening to me.
Going to be on tablets for five years may have to have Chemo as well as radiotherapy.
This is all so much to take in and this weekend have to tell my two teenage children thats the thing that really upsets me, I just dont want to upset them.
It has been a while since I have been on the site and I wanted to add some positives to balance my negatives so that when I have a bad moment I can look back and see that there were plenty in this whole strange roller coaster ride that we are on. Christmas was really good we had a fab time, it really made up for last year when we found out on the 16/12/08 that dads cancer had returned and was stage 4 terminal. New year was hard as dad was very grumpy and angry - understandable a new year of unknowns...
Wow, can't believe that so many have actually read my ramblings and taken the time to comment. I thought I'd been such a mardy bint! Thank you soooo much!
We went to the hospital yesterday both quietly contemplating what was going to be said. Clinic was only 30 mins late (was over an hour last time). We didn't see the lovely Prof but one of his registrars which I think is always a good sign when they delegate. I don't know if all the doctors are the same but ours seem to get us to repeat...
What a day ! woke up at 4.30 , hubby struggling to breath , felt really guilty as i was sleeping so soundly i didnt realise, first night for ages, always go off ok but normally wake again in early hours, any way, he got worse, he insisted on taking me to work, windscreen wiper broke , car sounded like it was going to break down, snowing , the language was blue, hubby came home to call dr or so i thought , with strict instructions to ring me, mean time i got to work told my boss situation and said...
January 13th Think I was a bit optimistic in setting my alarm for 10am…Up again at 5.30 so another 4 hours sleep. That’s not enough for me. Apparently it was enough for Margaret Thatcher which explains a lot - very tetchy… Been here two weeks now and on my own for ten days. Pete and I have never been more than one night without seeing each other - and that only a handful of times in 20 years. Likewise, haven’t seen the boys since Xmas Day. So, yes, I’m feeling it tonight....
..... Cheltenham hospital!
Like most places in the UK we've had our fair share of snow this past week (a bit more is being added as I type!) and travelling has been fun to say the least. On Monday a routine trip to Gloucester Hospital was called for. We dug our way out to the main road and proceeded in an orderly fashion to Gloucester. The main roads were clear of snow and other obstacles but not the hospital, unless we could disguise Mr Bad Fairy's car as an ambulance we had to make our way to...
Clive seems to be feeling a bit better. He is starting to get bored which is a good sign, and has been flicking elastic bands at me today to annoy me. The old Clive is still there battling to get out.
Off to look at new cars tomorrow. I strongly believe spending money is a great stress reliever!
New to all this blogging stuff and hoping that getting stuff off my chest will help. Sure nobody will read this, ranting is never very entertaining.
Tomorrow we go to see the lovely (though never has any good news for us) Professor. Our last visit, 2 days before Christmas was to find out if my husband’s 3 months of hell on Sutent had done any good, we wanted a 'yes it's great' or a 'no it's not worked', no shady grey areas please. However, what we got was. 'Well two tumours are the same' (good)...
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