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The medals on our chests
...Are portacaths for meds
Helmets won't stay on
Cause no hair is on our heads.
Our weapons of destruction
We take every day
We fight the battle within us
While we struggle on to play.
We fight with honor and courage
No marine could do as well
We are only little children
Living in this hell.
So bring on the medals
The Purple Hearts of Wars
The Gold Cross, The Silver Star
To place upon our scars.
For We are the Children of Cancer
No one has fought so hard
But every day...
Gosh I don't know how to bring this all together I am slightly tiddly but it is my birthday so think it is allowed!
Today I have stopped to think about it all, I have been so lucky in that I was diagnosed with advanced bowel cancer and after radiotherapy with chemo, three surgeries and 6 months chemo I have managed to have two scans showing NED so far. In some ways I feel guilty that I was lucky and others in my situation were not - my heart goes out to all those that didn't make it and especially...
My dad went for his chemo as usual and they told him his blood count was low, this seems to happen quite a lot, so they have put him on injections to improve it as they have told him that he must have the two combined treatments every fortnight without fail or it won't work. So home he came with his injections and everything went fine until he had to go for his next appointment....it seems the injections haven't done what they were expected to do in keeping his blood count levels up, so now i'm panicking...
Today we went for the next injection of Octreotide for Pat's Carcinoid Tumour. We waited on the unit for about an hour afterwards in case he was sick and he did not react at all. He felt so good that we stopped off on the way home for a bite to eat. When we got back he slept for a couple of hours and then said he felt fine apart from some soreness around the injection site. This has given him some hope that he will be able to have some quality of life. We are realistic about his situation with all...
Day 4 in hospital. Mum slept for 13 hours last nite, from 7.30pm to 8.30 this morning. i left her at 10pm last night and returned at 11 this morning, she was awake until 2.15pm and is still sleeping now. She's not really eating at all and just sipping at water. The best thing is she doesn't seem to be in any pain, but she wouldn't tell you anyway. ''I'm fine.'' is her favourite saying! My Mum is skeletal, it's heartbreaking to see her like this. Can't type any more, the tears are flowing. Sosanna...
Had my lymph node biopsy last Friday and unfortunately one of the stitches burst and ended up with a bit of an infection in the wound. My breast is so swollen and painful I think I will honestly be glad when it is gone (hubby took a photo of it this morning so we can do a before and after picture) LOL
Went to see my consultant and he does not think there will be any problem going ahead with the masectomy on Tuesday, I just hope the lymph node wound has healed up a bit more by then.
He did give...
A very strange day indeed.
I think I was so exhausted trying to please all the people all of the time and failing miserably in the majority of cases that my sub-conscious decided enough was enough and although I woke up at 7am and went to the loo, I got back under the duvet, cuddled the pooch and we slept soundly until 10.30am. Wow and hurrah for snuggly sleep-ins with the added bonus of a furry hotwater bottle that doesn't need filling with hot water! I can't tell you how lovely it was - just...
Over the last two years I have been to my doctor sevaral times with persistant diarrhea. He kept saying .... are you loosing weight "no" do you feel unwell "no" . Theres nothing to worry about then.
About the time of the symptoms starting he changed my BP tablets and on the leaflet it says may cause 'diarrhea' along with a whole host of other side effects.
This eased my mind and I put up with the diarrhea for a whole year ,then went back to the doctor and insisted he...
this week we went to the hospital to discuss radio therapy to the brain . It was decided that the liver cancer was more important as the tumour in the brain has been removed . So next week off to a different hospital to discuss chemo therapy to the liver . Mum is still being very brave mean while I am having nightmares quite literally when I do sleep. She has her beloved dog back with her keeping her company and i have stayed with her this week as much as possible. We wrote her requests for when...
I was just wondering, when you do leave for the last time Dad will I ever be 'really' happy again - or will my life always have this tinge of sadness which it has now already before you've even gone? Everything looks different, the whole world around me.....it is always there in the corner of my eye like the splinter of ice in The Snow Queen....the knowledge that some time soon you will be gone. At the back of every thought I have now is the constant low key sadness and I feel it lying...
