A very strange day indeed.
I think I was so exhausted trying to please all the people all of the time and failing miserably in the majority of cases that my sub-conscious decided enough was enough and although I woke up at 7am and went to the loo, I got back under the duvet, cuddled the pooch and we slept soundly until 10.30am. Wow and hurrah for snuggly sleep-ins with the added bonus of a furry hotwater bottle that doesn't need filling with hot water! I can't tell you how lovely it was - just what I needed I think.
Anyway. I unwillingly dragged myself into the shower while Rocky carried on snoozing and then once I'd pulled myself together we meandered down the road to Mumsy's for a very late breakfast indeed. Gordy's car wasn't there but I knew he'd arranged to go and watch the footie with some friends. I opened the door and my poor little Mumsy walked out of the living room crying her little eyes out. She was so distraught all I could do was hold her until the sobbing subsided a little. She said when Gordy left this morning he looked so ill she didn't want him to go out but hadn't dared say anything to him. So the cake making got put on hold until tomorrow and I spent what was left of the day and the evening with Mumsy. I couldn't bear to leave her as she was so upset and looked so small and vulnerable. It absolutely broke my heart. This woman used to be so strong and invincible and now she seems to be shrinking before my eyes.
I can't believe what this stinking illness is doing to my family. It's crucifying all of them. Everybody's eyes look hollow and haunted. All our sleep patterns are up the creek. We are all fighting to try and bring some normality into our lives when we know it will never be 'normal' ever again!
Gordy came home at 9.30pm and looked every bit as bad as Mumsy had said he did. He isn't eating very much now because his liver is so swollen, as soon as he puts anything like his normal amount of food into his stomach the pain of it pressing on his liver is excruciating. I persuaded him that he should really be drinking the high protein drinks he has been given and for once he didn't disagree or snap at me.
So Rocky and me are now back at mine curled up on the sofa watching I don't know what on the TV but the noise of it stops me thinking too much.
Hope you all have a peaceful night.
Much love and huge squidgy hugs,
Nin xxxx
