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Had to take car to the garage yesterday, my daughter came with me and it was difficult to keep being "human" I know the family mean well and I can't hurt them but I just want to be left alone and not to have to smile and make conversation. I can't even cope with me.
I can't believe it's 81/2 weeks since he died. At the service we played Celine Dion singing "Because you loved me" and every word of the song is true. I'd never really listened to it before and heard it by chance...
Here I am wanting to share positive thoughts with my MacLand friends.
Yesterday, I was determined to get to my T'ai Chi class. So glad I went. For 90 minutes, I forgot all the rubbish and concentrated on the Form, the exercises, breathing, my centre etc really putting energy back into me and feeling my strength. (Sorry folks - it's a T'ai Chi thing.) And I was with my lovely caring friends. The good feelings have lasted through till today. I want to share them with you all.
(Perhaps...
Death is nothing at all
I have only slipped away into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other
That we are still
Call me by my old familiar name
Speak to me in the easy way you always used
Put no difference into your tone
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed
At the little jokes we always enjoyed together
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was
Let it be spoken without e...
Today I'm feeling angry! Cancer is taking over my life! It's all I talk about, think about and read about! I beat by battle in 2010 when I went into remission and there isn't a day that passes that I don't think it's returned as a part of my body gives off a little pain or something...however I always manage to rationalize my thoughts. Never the less, there is no escaping it! My partner has Multiple Myeloma and my closest friend and God Mother to my children has Breast Cancer! What is going on??...
Hi All
Sorry not been in, been a busy bee looking after mum, she's doing OK. Had a lovely xmas and New Year. She still fighting hard, been four yrs since she was diagnosed now. Still waiting to hear if the second lot of radio is happening or not. She is becoming increasingly uncomfortable but we're trying hard to keep it at bay.
I on the other hand am doing a bit better been diagnosed with wheat intolerance and a few other bits. All under control though, just plodding along and taking...
A sunny December day was given over to cloud cover as I left the outpatients department with my "life changing news". Some vague but persistent symptoms, some scans, the course of a few weeks and a label called cancer and there you go life changed.
Dark brown eyes, bright blue eyes, smokey grey eyes and beautiful cat-like green eyes all showed the same fear when I told them.
"Any questions" the handsome doctor said (I was in shock but not blind)
Only how long have I got...
2 weeks ago today I was back in the operating theatre having an ileostomy reversal.
The decision to have this done was one of the hardest decisions that I have ever had to make. Strange most people think, that decision should have been a non brainer but that bag began to feel like part of me and in an odd way I was attached to it as it symbolised one of the very reasons that I received an all clear and am still here today.
Initially I could not imagine living my life with two stoma's. I was devastated...
I am going to sign consent forms on Monday 23rd January to start Phase 1 Trials. All going well with scans etc. I should be starting the trial on 7th February.
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