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As i lie awake at night
Whilst others are asleep
I take a trip down memory lane
With a tear upon my cheek
I think of all the heartache
I try so hard to hide
I think of all the times
I've broken down and cried
I cry because i love you
I cry because i care
I cry because i'll wake
And you won't be there
My love you meant the world to me
And words just cannot say
Just how much i miss you now
That you have gone away
I felt i had known you all my life
And i've loved you from the start
Now you've goneand taken with
My poor broken old heart
There's so much more i had to say
But now it's far too late
I;ll just have to bide my time
Till wemeet at heaven's gate
So Dave finished his chemo & radio and was gradually weaning himself off the steroids when out of the blue he got sick.
He had diarrhea, a high temp and hot & cold flushes and was sleeping all the time.
I was so worried but just didn't know what to do for the best!
In the end I called one of the nurses on his team at the hospital and he spoke to he registrar. She said it was probably nothing to worry about but to bring him in so that they could do a full assessment.
They were fab...
For all who dont already know mum paessed away on monday the 24/1/11@ 22.30 she was a fighter she put a fight up till the end there was no pain she is getting buried on monday the 31st at 11am i was with her so she wouldnt die alone
Had my first chemo yesterday, used the cold cap which I found really easy and not uncomfortable almost good to have a distraction!Didn't find the chemo quite so easy my chemo nurse said I have very small veins and my body went into fight of flight mode meaning the blood was pumping round my vital organs but not so much in my arms, meant the chemo was really slow going in just the first one took longer that all the drugs would normally take to adminiister. Not surprised its the drugs going in and...
I realise how we have to be careful on diet and foods. Last night we were up all but 1 hour because I had ignored Asher taking a quiche from the fridge which he had bought yesturday in Tesco in the reduced section.
Within the hour he was really unwell so it has to be the quiche but I think with the medication and redcued food intake alongside the reduction in fruit and veg the build up of constipation meant that the poor bloke was begging for mercy.
Throughout the four years of major ops he has...
Another week gone by and so much seems to be going on. Why can there not be week of calm?
Yesterday was the funeral of a friend of mine who killed himself before Christmas. I know it sounds daft, but it made me think about my Grandad.
My gran has decided to go and live with her eldest son down in Cornwall, which is definately a good thing for her, but it makes me sad, like I'm losing her in a way as I won't see her much. I'd never tell her that of course, I just want her to be happy...
Tomorrow is the day I have been waiting for these past 18 months. My stoma will be reversed and my journey with cancer will come to an end.
Hopefully that is true, no more statistics, no more probability theory just good clean honest living. Valuing the fact that I have been very fortunate.
I will be in hospital for upto 10 days depending on how well I recover.
I didn't think that I would be nervous not at all more to the contrary excited, but thats not true. I feel very nervous because...
