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Originally published 25/4/13
Its been a nice day today, I went for a walk into the village and back in the sunshine - which was only slightly misconceived, I came back with a pleasant feeling of warm accomplishment which only later translated into a need to have a nap from sheer tiredness.
Today I have been mostly just trying to get back into a routine, doing odd little jobs like taking all my pre-operation pain medication back to the chemists (I'm not taking any pain control now, which compared...
Originally published 24/4/13
Finally. Made it home, over two weeks in hospital and finally I'm back.
Feels really good to be back, but I would like to take a moment to extol the people who cared for me in the hospital. They are the very best of people, if you ask me, working tirelessly to meet the needs of patients under their care. I don't care what anyone else says now, the NHS is worth every single penny that is spent on it if it filled with people such as these. The level of care and compassion...
Originally published 23/4/13
Hopefully this is the last entry to my diary from a hospital room, I am heartily sick of this place now - the doctors and nurses, in fact all the staff on ward, have been wonderful - friendly, helpful, caring, nice, attentive. In fact I think these people epitomise what is right about the NHS, in fact what is right about people in general. It's safe to say that rather a lot of my faith in humanity has been restored. If there is anywhere that you can see just how
...Originally published 22/4/13
Speech and language saw me today for the first time, not much help really, I've had enough of "you're doing so well on your own" and to be honest it feels a bit like I'm the only one that's trying here.
Once again, I have to be patient, let things heal and then the work can start. I guess this is fair enough, but I really want to get back to my old self now not in six months time.
I do wonder how close I will get, how long it will take for me to...
Originally published 21/4/13
My recovery from that massive operation continues, I find I can cope with the purée food better and generally I am feeling more like my old self.
Speech is a worry, I slur and slurp my way through speech, often having to repeat myself. Everyone says my speech is coming along well, but as usual that's not enough for me. In my head I understand that the cancer has taken my old voice, my heart just wants me to be the same as before.
The other worry is, have we...
Originally published 21/4/13
Where to start? Perhaps a summary of events today;
Kids came to visit
Feeding tube "lost" by consultant
Clips out
Stitches out
All but 1 dressing removed
Managed to escape (with consultants blessing) outside of hospital for an hour!
Woah, I mean, Woah what's been the highlight? Has to be the kids, first time they visited is still had drains and feeding tube and looked rather like Frankenstein when I walked.
The teenager (you know who you are!) Has been up often...
Originally published 19/4/13
It has impressed me how much difference a good nights sleep can make. I'd not really noticed that my sleep was bad, but until last night I think. I must have only been sleeping for 50% of the night.
A certain despondence had settled on me yesterday, to be honest, I had found eating much more difficult than I had expected. Not sure what my expectations were, but obviously they were higher than reasonable in the given circumstances. perhaps I just expect a lot from...
Originally published 18/4/13
After some great improvements today has been less about making strides and more about small steps. I have found this incredibly annoying and frustrating.
My task for the day was to start a "soft" diet, having managed with liquids fairly well yesterday today I was needed to try some soft foods. Well I tried but didn't do as well as I would have liked, my major problem is working out where in my mouth the food actually is. My mouth is pretty numb still, although some...
Originally published 17/4/13
Its funny, recovering in hospital, as you do, what brings the most pleasures. As my surgical recovery progresses well then I find more of my little dignities coming back. This is a very nice feeling.
I don't think that I really knew how important my independence was to me until I lost most of it. My aches and pains diminish so I don't take much pain relief now - a really nice break from recent months - my mobility improves as the swelling in my neck and jaw goes....
Originally published 16/4/13
Its been a slow, contemplative day today. It has shuffled along rather than raced. Bit like me perhaps.
God but waiting is SLOW. I have to wait for everything, my surgery has made much movement delicate processes of balancing achievements against requirements. A twist just so brings my kindle into view but pain radiates across my neck and shoulders and I have to get up, collect the damned drains and feeding machine up and make sure the tubes aren't tangled and twisted...
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