Any young adult orphans on here?

Hi Amiebelle welcome to the forum and I hope that you are surprised that you have a reply why would someone not want to reply to your post thats what we are here for. 

I am so sorry that you find yourself as you describe yourself as a parentless young person. You may .be parentless but you are not alone and never will be when you are on nere as we are always lurking and hoping to offer support and/or information for people.

I dont know enough to answer your question about other young people in the same situation as you are but Im wondering if you wanted to give the Macmillan Line a call as they have lots of resources at hand and local knowledge of maybe groups or people they can put you in touch with. 08088080000

Meantime Im sending some huge big hugs your way. xxxxxxx  

Hi Amiebelle,

I can't get over how courageous you are after going through all that with no other family members by your side. I don't know how you've coped. I'm 22 and lost my mum just over a week ago to bowl cancer also. I'm having such a hard time accepting what's happened as I still don't believe my little mum's gone forever. I have two older sisters but I still struggle so much and the pain is starting to become unbearable. I've lost count how many times I've thought about ending my life just so I don't feel this heartache anymore. Hope you haven't given up on this chat since I see you didn't get many replies. Hope to speak soon.

Mel x

Hi Mel,

Thanks for replying, it’s nice to hear from you! I am sorry to hear you lost your mum in a similar way to myself, it’s the worst experience, especially for young people like ourselves who should have had our mums around a lot longer than what we got. I’m thinking back to that first week after I lost my mum, my emotions were all over the place, and you definitely haven’t had the time to process it yet! I’m glad you have two older sisters who are looking out for you! So was your mum your only parent or do you guys have a dad to rely on for some more support? 

I know everyone says it and it might sound meaningless to you right now but please don’t do anything permanent like ending your life. Try and think about what your mum would want, that’s what I did and still do at times - would she want you to die or to give up? Definitely not. And think how it would affect your sisters, who like yourself are already beginning the greiving process for you mum. You have to stick it out, and as cliche as it sounds it does start to get easier and you start to have actual good days again eventually. 

Finally, we’ve been through something most people our age haven’t a clue about. The positive to this is you become a stronger person than you were, because by default you just have to be, and you have life experiences and strength your friends and other young people don’t really understand or aren’t equipped with yet. The negative to this, something that I’ve found really difficult especially having no family support either, is that you can feel very very isolated, because it’s not something a lot of young people can relate to, as most of them still rely highly on their parents as well. That can definitely be tough and I definitely still struggle with this even now. 

If you would like someone to talk to who has been in a similar situation at any time, I’m more than happy to message you! I’ve not checked but I assume this site has direct messaging so I’ll DM you. Since I’ve been through most of what you’ve still to experience and can help you with that, and just be a friend when you need one! And I need someone to talk to as much as you even now, or I wouldn’t have made this post! :)

Wishing you all the best, take all the time you need to process everything but stay strong! 

Beth x

Hi Amiebelle,

I'm so sorry for your loss and I'm sorry that you didn't have any other family members to support you. You sound like an incredibly strong person.

I'm glad that I came across your post because I'm actually in quite a similar situation to you: ever since I was a baby, it has always been just me and my mum. We are very close and she means the world to me. However, February this year she was diagnosed with incurable brain cancer. These past few months she has been undergoing treatment so as to control the growth. Unfortunately, this Monday the MRI scan showed possible growth so at the moment we are waiting 6 weeks for another scan and then the doctors (and we) will decide which path to take. Either way, even though we're not exactly sure when at the moment, my mum will eventually pass away. For the time being she is as healthy as she can be so we are just taking every day as it comes.

Like you, I have decided to stay strong no matter what happens. I know that I will have ups and downs, and when I feel down I will accept it since these feelings are normal, but I will always look forward to the future, for example with my studies, and try to live my life to the fullest.

I wish you all the best with everything.