Hi everyone,
I never thought I’d ever consider joining an online community for cancer. My family have been affected by cancer in recent years, but this feels completely different.
My mum has been diagnosed with breast cancer, she’s in her 60s and had no symptoms. It was picked up on a routine mammogram. At the moment it appears to be two lumps, grade 1 & 2, both invasive. It’s still very early and waiting for results of more investigations and tests. She has a lumpectomy booked and will need radiation.
I see cancer almost every day in my job, I see all stages, all kinds and get involved in the palliative and end of life stages. I see how quickly things can change and how it affects people and their loved ones. I try to show as much compassion as I can, but still remaining objective so I can support them.
When it suddenly hits my dear mum, someone so close out of nowhere, it’s probably a feeling only those in a similar position can describe. Although it’s been caught in the early stages, and we feel so blessed it has been, it’s life changing. I see the world differently. So many things seem insignificant now, and some insignificant things are suddenly significant. The general feel of life has changed. Given how common cancer is and what I see at work, I didn’t think it wouldn’t happen to us, but I had no idea of how it would feel. Fortunately mum is quite fit and healthy which, I’m sure will help her in this journey. Over the past few years I’ve been thinking more and more about my parents getting older. This diagnosis has reinforced it even more and added a bigger pinch of mortality to the mix.
I was struggling with my mental health before we found out, particularly anxiety and with a few other things going on, I’ve reached a point of breaking down. I’ve had to call in sick to work because I’m just not fit to be working, it wouldn’t be fair on others. Somehow, I need to find a way to pick myself back up and work on self care (I’ve always been rubbish at) so I can help support mum.
This wasn’t really a question or request for advice, more of a way to get some words out.
Thank you for listening.
