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I can remember looking at the Professor, who came into the hospital room with three others of his staff. I knew deep down what he was going to say, and I sat near to him while he told my husband that there was nothing more that could be done for him. There was some talk about the whys and wherefores, and then the Prof stood up, and made to leave, then my husband asked the question, the white elephant that had been in the room, how long do I have left
The Prof and his team sat back down again and...
Can't say this was much fun but it wasn't so awful either, particularly the good news that came with it.
I was told the CTscan shows a lump in or on my voicebox (larynx) and after squirting some anaesthetic up my nostril, the doctor fed an endoscope(?) long tube with a light on the end, through my nostril and into my throat. It wasn't painful but felt pretty weird and horrible even so. He said he could see what looks like a sort of white blister with clear fluid. There was an amount...
I haven't blogged in ages simply because I think I have been bottling everything up and in a way...I think i've been in denial. I also stopped coming on the Macmillan website as everytime I saw a new blog post...a new forum topic...or anything really...it HIT me so hard and I just think I needed a break from it.
I am back now though as I feel I need to get everything out & hopefully that will help. Marc & I have been really busy with our wedding plans...we found out when dad...
I had the neck/thorax CTscan today; it doesn't take long and I'm getting to be an old hand at them now. This time I paid more attention to the feeling of the dye injection going through my body, blood moves seriously fast! It's painless, just a feeling of internal warmth
Having taken a taxi to the hospital, I got brave and WALKED back the mile to my house. It did take half as long again as it usually does but I feel very virtuous and doubtless did myself some good. Yesterday I walked...
Thought I would give you an update on my mum. After many problems at the hospital and dealing with some difficult questions regarding if she wanted ressuitating if she goes into a cardiac arrest, a space comes up at our local hospice and she was well enough to be moved to the Hospice of the Good Shepherd in Chester. The move was quick and in my heart I knew this was the right thing for her and her care, my head was telling me something else. Terror.
Dad and I arrive an hour after she arrives by...
Hi. Can anyone help? My dad has suspected mesothelioma but all test results have come back inconclusive. My mum feels as though she is being left in 'limbo' and no help is being offered to them. He is really very poorly, has increasingly limited mobility and has had a permanent drain fitted as the fluid on his lungs was constantly building up. Has anyone else had this experience where a diagnosis does not seem possible? He's not well enough for an open biopsy and so we're not sure where to...
There are lots of jobs that I imagine myself doing.....with glamourous perks such as travelling the world 1st class, earning obscene amounts of money for doing very little, living a luxurious lifestyle with a housekeeper, someone to do the garden, someone to drive me wherever I want to go, someone to cook for me and so it goes on, but what job did I get without even being interviewed for? CARER to my dear husband, salary free, extended hours, learn on the job, clearing up puke, dealing with abuse...
Since I can no longer speak to you, I thought I'd write letters to you, like diary entries I suppose, to say what I'm thinking.
I was struck by the number of books you had, Mum, on beating cancer, eating well, positive thinking. At the time, I said to Dad that you really did try and beat it, but then it occurred to me that despite all that, you were still not able to stop it.
I'm listening to your funeral hymns and songs. Morbid perhaps. When I hear them, I feel as though...
Well in hospital again last sunday, constant sickness the doctor keeps saying its constipation. Tried everything and it is now 12 weeks since radiotherapy, He has been losing weight every week and is now very thin. They kept him in untill wed to try and clear it, he is now home but still no appitite. Dont really know what to do next, it is pointless that they keep saying eat lots of fibre when he can only manage a small bowl of soup! I feel there most be something else going on, ant advice?
Now 2 days after the op, managed to eat something non liquid this morning and the pain killers are working fine. Many, many thanks for the kind comments and concern which really help; one thought - this was only the preliminary op, getting through the chemoRT will be on a different scale, as most of you "veterans" already know so will be relying on your experience a lot!!!
Regards,
Colin
