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I'm finding things difficult, still. I have good and bad days and on top of those really bad days, sometimes. I have found an outlet in the gym and lifting weights again. I missed my session today and I'm sure that contributed to having a bad day.
I'm still at Mum's bungalow surrounded by memories and at night things overwhelm me so much more. It's always when it's quiet, isn't it? I start a new job on Monday, so hopefully things will be looking up for me :)
Nothing...
Evening dear readers,
I should be writing this blog about how my first immunotherapy infusion went. Instead I'm writing about how I still haven't got that far.
I didn't get my first infusion last week as hoped.
We booked our train tickets and hotel room as the hospital suggested we would be better to spend the night before in London so we could be at the hospital in the morning ready for a raft of tests and then a plan to have the infusion later in the day.
Dad and I arrived at the ho...
Just a quick note. Big day tomorrow. I can’t believe it’s been over a year since I started having problems. I’ve known since my initial diagnosis that I would need major abdominal surgery but it always seemed so far away and happening to a different person.
Now it all feels very personal and very immediate.
Lots going on in this little head of mine. My life will never be the same again. I’ve read numerous entries from so many people describing their ‘new’ lives and it’s more about...
I want today to be a duvet day where I can hide from the whole world and not have to face my life. A day where I could hide under the duvet and cry and scream until all the emotions of my broken heart are gone. Broken heart from mums diagnosis and a broken heart from a broken relationship.
Hi, I've never done anything like this before but I need to get it out of my head & possible some advice on the whole situation.Couple months ago found out nan had bladder cancer, she went for this operation which was unsuccessful they couldn't remove it... long story short few days ago she got told it's now in her pelvis and spreading in her lymph nodes (I didn't go with her so this what mum told me) and there is treatments that will only prolong her life she incurable.. as she has radiotherapy...
My beautiful strong courageous mum died on 8th Jan 2017.
One month after her 60th Birthday.
It breaks my heart to write that. She was the best person in my life. She battled so hard with all of her cancer. Breast cancer done. Lung cancer I'll fight that, it's spread to my bones FU. I'll keep going no matter what.
My heart hurts. I want to be strong for her but finding it impossible.
I knew this was coming. I prepared for this to happen. I thought.
...
Wednesday 1st February.
Today I got up feeling niggly, actually I'd been awake since 4am and didn't get to sleep until well after 1am, that could explain why, damn those steroids. Oh and the hot flushes I was getting all night too.
Hubby must have picked up on it although I was trying to be normal, he phoned his friends and arranged a time to visit and see the new puppy they got on Sunday. We'd decided last night we probably wouldn't go as the weather was going to be bad and we wanted...
Throughout my life music has had a huge impact. It's made me feel happy and sad. Sometimes when I listen to a song it transports me straight back to a memory as if I was there.
I heard a beautiful song for the first time tonight - I miss you by the missing people choir. This song was written to bring hope for the people left behind after someone goes missing. People interpret songs and lyrics differently. Listening to this song had me in tears for very different reasons than it was intended...
Hi
My dear 80 year old Mum was diagnosed with Uterine Cancer on 3rd November 2016, it has spread to her fallopian tubes, ovaries, lymph and also affecting her aorta. The last few months have been tough to say the least for her and the family but we are all trying to do our best, and we have had support from her team, MacMillan has been wonderful. She is stoic and trying to protect us all from the reality but she is declining, loosing weight, continuing to bleed, lost her sense of small and taste...
Tuesday 31st January 2017
Today has been a long day, got up did the usual temperature which was fine, I always worry more on blood test on chemo day. I made some scones to take in with me and tidied around as I knew we'd be back late.
The chemo was fine after the first attempt at getting the cannula in failed miserably when she punctured my vein, changed sides had everything went well after that, I was worried about the allergic reaction with this new chemo as the nurse mentioned if when...
