Hi all. This is my first post so I will try and keep it short.
My mum is 59 and after 1 year in remission her Hodgkins Lymphoma came back in Sept. After 2 different types of treatment making her very sick the decision was made to stop any further treatments. She was in hospital at this time and during her stay tested positive for COVID. A week has passed and she has no symptoms so they have let her home. I had to make the tough decision of leaving my husband and kids to self isolate with her and her partner to help out and spend some time with her as we don't know how long we have left.
She got home today and every minute has been a nightmare. Due to being in hospital for 4 weeks she is struggling with the isolation and social distancing within the home. She has complained about every single thing I have been doing and that's not like her. She is being rude and snappy and saying really hurtful things. I think I was naïve to expect nights filled with laughter and reminiscing but I wasn't expecting this, its like I picked up a different person from the hospital.
I guess I am just looking for some advice on how to cope with it? I cannot even BEGIN to imagine what is going through her head but I also need her to know I am doing my best without cracking.
Does anyone have any advice at all?
Hi ,
Welcome to the community and so sorry to read this and what you are going through, I think many people are going a little bit stir crazy at the moment but doing that on top of caring for someone is even more complex.
You say you had these hopes of how these weeks might go and perhaps you have a sense of loss in that is has not worked like that. I am sure your mum was looking forward to a bit more freedom when she got out of hospital, I know Janice can get very down when she has been an in-patient and now if anything she is likely to see her movement even more limited.
The only real advice is to sit down and talk with your mother about how you are feeling, it might help if you looked at our guide Looking after someone with cancer as I am sure there are things in there you will identify with in your emotions.
One thing when my parents were ill that really helped us was looking through the family photograph collection, there are so many pictures where we now know about who is in the photo where that information might have been lost.
Do post on here whenever you need because there will be lots of people in this situation and together we can help each other.
<<hugs>>
Steve
