For a week now I have been visited by my wife in my dreams very mixed up dreams but I. The end l get near my wife I then wake in tears does anyone else have dreams like this to
yes that we have in common, I think of her all the time, I talk to her all the time, I also play short videos which I have on the phone but she's totally in my soul, those 50 years have integrated her into my very being.
As lots have said we are stuck in a reality we didn't choose.
Spent a lifetime working bringing up a family, and then just when it's our time it's cut short.
Love you Amanda and thank goodness she is in my head and my heart and always will be.
yes that we have in common, I think of her all the time, I talk to her all the time, I also play short videos which I have on the phone but she's totally in my soul, those 50 years have integrated her into my very being.
As lots have said we are stuck in a reality we didn't choose.
Spent a lifetime working bringing up a family, and then just when it's our time it's cut short.
Love you Amanda and thank goodness she is in my head and my heart and always will be.
In the beginning, my husband very rarely visited my dreams. But he is often there now. I have a terrific photo of Chris on my bedside table and it has become a ritual to speak to him every night and kiss his face. I look at his photos all the time and the large canvas we have of him that was central at the memorial service sits within feet of my chair in the living room. But I want more, I wish I could have more...more visits in dreams, more feeling him beside him, more hearing his voice. The dreams are such a double-edged sword.
"i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) ..." Life must end, but love is eternal.
I think this is where we link...that integration into our soul, our very being, of those we love and struggle without. Not just a family love but a deep unreachable love that only a couple profoundly in love experience. I guess we are paying the price of that love and of living life as one entity, in our case, mutually obsessively. We never needed anyone else, and I for one don't want that to change however hard it is.
I have two videos of John and both horrible. Ironically he loved cameras and recording stuff, but this meant he was always behind the camera. The videos i have are not exactly nice and sound is devastatingly poor quality. One video details how painful his suffering is. He did it alone in the bathroom. Sound is awful and though he is largely matter of fact about it, it is heartbreaking. The other video is prior to a big operation he survived. I didn't know he had made this video. He was dyslexic but had painstakingly written about four big sheets of paper expressing his thoughts about those in his life and especailly poignant messages for his brothers and our kids and ultimately me. I am so so distraught about the awful sound. He made a mistake of having a queen cd on in the background. I absolutely howl at this video but feel so so luck to still have it. Wish these things had been around and affordable in our youth. Love you John B. xxx
My partner of 20 years has terminal cancer and every night for the past week (which has been pretty traumatic as far as his symptoms go) I dream that someone comes behind me as I’m standing in a dark room and gives me a brief but strong hug. It has woken me every night and I’m always crying. I really believe there is something in theses ‘dreams’ and I find it comforting.
