It's so very recent for you and perhaps you are still in shock. Going through the motions. Doing all the awful ,necessary things that we have to do after losing a loved one. More so a Spouse. I found all those things that needed doing in person extremely difficult. I don't know how I stopped myself screaming at staff when they said "Sorry for your loss " I know they say it out of politeness and have no other words or know what else to say. But I got sick of it. And yet I have done the same in the past . After a while I had to try ignore the words . They are only words ..from some might be genuine . But Nothing anyone says can make us feel better. I do hope you have good support from family and friends. At a time like this we certainly need someone to lean on. Not many really understand what is happening to us while we try to come to terms with this our greatest ever loss. Our Mind and body takes a massive Hit. Once the veil of shock wears off we feel so many Emotions. I was surprised at the mix I have experienced. I expected only deep sadness ..but as you will probably also find Grief is very complex. At times you might feel like you are going mad. I still do after 14 months. The overwhelming feelings can knock me sideways when I least expect it. Whatever you feel / think will probably be normal. It's good to talk it out. Keeping the feelings suppressed is only going to make it harder. Try eat well, get rest when needed . And hopefully sleep when you need to. A little exercise helps too. You must keep moving ,don't sit and ponder too long. Accept help when needed ,because the offer won't always be there. People get on with their own lives after a short time and we are left to cope. Ask for Counselling. Talking does help. Come and express your feelings here where we all get it.
