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Yesterday I went for a PET scan. What I actually got was a five-hour tour of the Westcountry.
I'm rapidly finding that stress about my actual illness is pushed up by the complications of procedure and infrastructure. Following the lymph node results, I was scheduled yesterday afternoon for a PET scan at the mobile unit parked outside Taunton hospital. It needs a six-hour fast, so I started the day with an early breakfast and packing various stuff (water, food for after, warm pullover, etc).
Well as the title says!
I am back to work again in a week, after having 8 weeks off! this will be hard going! as mcuh as I am looking forward to going back to work, I will miss my babies, my middle baby will be starting school for the first time, i can only drop her off on the first tuesday, but I wont be able to pick her up which makes me a bit sad in fact very sad :(
This is where the reality hits home again, mum was supposed to have Sophie for us, something she was looking forward too, however...
So here I am, quite a way through my war with cancer, admitting that its not a breeze.
Everyone around me says how well I am doing, how amazing i am.... really? When i do or think anything related to 'my condition' i cry buckets!!! This upsets my hubby so I do it in private mostly.
when I shower I weep for my lost breast, when my arm aches I get angry that cancer stole my lymph nodes! and then last week, feeling so ill and in so much pain after my change in chemo regime, God and I had a...
Beach and sky - a day on the Jurassic Coast helped
If I've given the impression from the first couple of matter-of-fact posts that I'm pretty laid-back about the situation: I'm not. The past few weeks have been - to use a cliché - an emotional roller-coaster.
At the first tentative diagnosis after the CT scan, both Irene and I cried. Later, it more or less crystallized into a situation of Irene crying several times a day, and my being poisonously irritable, though at first I didn...
It's been a year since my first diagnosis of rectal cancer. It's been 20 months since I first suspected I had cancer and went to my GP with those first signs of very small spots of blood in toilet and a constant stomach ache. The GP dismissed my symptoms and said I had piles and injected me. Went back several more times to surgery with symptoms getting more severe and GP becoming more patronising and dismissive. The last straw was GP telling me I was obsessed, I was so upset and angry that...
I've chosen to start a blog at Macmillan for several reasons:
Habit. I run a blog already, and writing about my life has become an ingrained diary-keeping habit. This is perhaps a selfish reason, but writing helps me handle difficulties.
Privacy. I don't want to write about this side of my life in my existing blog, yet. My parents are elderly, none too well themselves, and very stressed by other circumstances. I don't want to add to their worries. We're on good terms, but they live overseas...
So, I had a firm diagnosis of cancer on Thursday 23rd August.
I'd always imagined that would be a clear-cut thing, but I don't actually know what kind of cancer, or where.
quick wiggle effect of flashback
Call me James (a pseudonym). I'm in my mid-50s, a semi-retired English technical writer living with my wife Irene (also a pseudonym) in a south-coast English town. We've no children. I've previously been in good health – a little overweight but well in the green for BMI, a non-smoker...
I am a daddy’s girl; his little princess and mini-me. My mum knows this, and over the last 18 months she has watched as my world shattered around me; as I dedicated my every moment to care for him, and then my every tear as I grieved the loss of my first true love.
My parents seperated when I was eleven years old. I came to terms with it and I came to love my step-dad as the years went by. My parents were schoolyard sweethearts who married young, and before they had reached their mid-twenties...
On 12 November 1986 I laid eyes on my first love.
On 1 March 1986, nine months earlier I had been at his wedding. I was nothing more than the size of a peanut; just starting to grow the fingers that I would wrap around his, and the lips that would kiss him so lovingly for the next 25 years were just beginning to take shape.
From that first moment that I saw him, the moment that he became a daddy, and I his princess; I knew love.
On 3 March 2012 I saw a rainbow outside my bedroom door. That...
