Hi everyone. I’m not very good at telling anyone how I feel. I am also aware that my posts are cynical and seem to annoy people. Sorry for that I gave myself a good talking to my husbands ashes are in a box by my bed I don’t know what to do with them but at least I can say good night to him I am so angry and tired all the time it’s been 15 months I use music to drag out all the pain and hurt that is me since he died I sometimes reference this in my posts. My husband wanted me to play ‘fire starter’ at his cremation I couldn’t do it. But music was amhis passion. At the moment my go to’s are Leornard Cohen’s ‘treaty’ Darius Rucker’s wagon wheel ( to cheer me up) and Roy Orbison’s in dreams. Could you share your go to music with me I would love to listen to the songs / music that gets you through I haven’t yet found a song that captures the experience of lying next to your husband of 35 years and listening to him taking his last breath Don’t think Abba or Beethoven released anything like that (can’t imagine why) but happy to be corrected. It will be much appreciated- thanks x
Hello all. Music was a huge part of our life, too - in the early days we would make mix tapes for each other and play them when we were apart (hahaha, when I first heard "The Sweetest Girl" by Scritti Politti, or Radiohead's "Thinking About You"!). Our wedding disco was entirely compiled by us both, we didn't want a band, we wanted to hear the original artists. I couldn't honestly pick one song - many of your selections were also "ours" We went from classical to punk to ska (a favourite) to Rabbie Burns. And we would dance to them all. At the moment I have Leonard Cohen's "Bird on a Wire" sung by Simone Iswa on a loop 
but tomorrow it could be something else, maybe "Ay Fond Kiss" by Eddie Reader. No music at the funeral, unfortunately - it was at a time when it had to be outdoors and only 10 people. I've listened to all your suggestions - they are all unbearably beautiful xxx
