I wondered if this feeling of wanting to just disappear is normal? I am so scared of the future, I wonder if I should book myself into retirement homes, I don't have children.
I just feel alone and that I'm the only one.
The only family I have are my brother sister in law neice and nephew. They want us both to sell our houses and move in all together. Which is wonderful from the point of view I cant manage to be alone. But now I'm panicking how do I make that work. What do I do when im old and need to be in care. What if they decide they hate me and im left with this huge debt trying to buy a house I don't need. I just feel sick like there's no way out of the pain and the loneliness.
I know im rambling sorry. I thought it'd help to say it to someone. The panic, the pain. I miss Nick so much. I'm never going to manage this
