Hi everyone.
I had a very stressful weekend. I went out to a friend on Saturday and we had nothing planned but a lovely day in her garden with nice food and a few gin and tonics. But then, ot of the blue, her sister rang to tell her that her son, my friend's nephew, was in a critical hospital in one of the regional hospitals in a critical condition after a bike accident where someone hit him off his bike. She asked us to go immediately to the hospital. I told her that I would understand if she wanted me to go home, but she said she would be happy if I came with her. So I did. The guy, only 24 years of age, went to a motor bike race and was it by another bike. He has several frektures on his right arm but more worrying is a brain bleed that they hope will stop because they have put him into an induced koma.
It was a difficult day. I met my friend's whole family, all in their own worries and fear and grief. And I just sat there holding space for them.
Some time during the hours of waiting for the doctors to emerge, I thought to myself: Yes, I have lost my soul mate, but now I am seeing a family in pain for different reasons and I compöletely understood how that must feel to them. I can't really put it in words what I felt... It was something like "May you all be safe. May you all be peaceful. May you all be calm." And I had this strong sense that my own tragedy, even though it was that I had lost my soul mate only at the ate of 57, there are other people around me who go through their personal hel. It somehow made me feel very peaceful and calm to understand that. Another way of moving forward, I thought, and that my own very difficult and sad loss has actually made me more available and my heart more open to other people who don't know yet whether they are going to lose their family member through this tragedy.
Do you know what I mean? It took the focus off my situation a litte like: Others have different problems, but they are for them just as hard as it is for me. Does that make sense?
Love, Mel.
