First scan

Hi Jools63

This year has gone by so quickly in some ways . How have you been getting on ? 

I think it’s been a tough year and when you have to process other things on top of covid you suddenly realise you have already spent a lot of your inner resources. 

I would imagine it would take a few good scans to start gaining confidence in your health again . You are human and the anxiety mounts before results, even for family ! Just remember emotions are unreliable indicators thankfully. Stats are actually in your favour and the more distance you put between yourself and your diagnosis the less likely you are to experience a recurrence. Hopefully your CEA markers have also been reflecting that .

I don’t think the dread of recurrence goes away I am always half prepared but also with a back up plan . But that’s not your story . You have to stay firmly where your facts are and not let your mind wander . Keep to the evidence you have . Nothing to indicate that is your situation and that’s where you must stay . One young girl years ago refused to let herself even think about results until the day before she got them . It took some practice but I try to follow her example and we have  become a family who compartmentalises now ! I wish I had done it much earlier on . 
The other thing to remember some recurrences are small and operable . One of my mum’s was whipped out at 8 mm . Her scan was in fact a life saver . But I still hate them with a passion . Strangely enough my mum does not give them a second thought . She gets more concerned when they space them out or talk about stopping them . I stopped counting around 33 scans ! Yikes . 

Wishing you every success with your results .

Court 

Court, 

I really would just love to meet you, to have a coffee with you, or a glass of wine.

Your wisdom, your knowledge and your kindness make us all feel so much better.

Thank you so much for all that you do, I know you have been through so much with your mum and her strength inspires us all.

Thank you Court, I am sending you a huge hug

xxx

Jools63

I am also waiting for results of scans, I am expecting a call from my oncologist to see if the radio and chemo has done it's magic. I am usually a very positive person but at the moment I am very tearful and anxious. It's probably the time of the year,  It's an emotional time at best.

Its been a terrible year but I am trying very hard to keep cheerful.

Take care and I hope so much all is good for you.

Lots of love 

xx

Thanks Court. You’re very kind to take the time to reply. I’ve woken up a little less anxious today, so will try to hang on to that. The sun is shining where I am, and I’ll be heading to the beach later with my dogs, so   feeling a bit more positive.

I hope you and your mum are both well.

very best wishes.

Thanks for your response Phoebe21. It’s kind of comforting to know that someone else knows how I’m feeling at the moment. I was so stressed at the hospital that I forgot to ask how I’ll get my results! I’m hoping it will be a phone call, but don’t mind who it’s from. The waiting is again the hardest part. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

very best wishes.

Hi Jools63, I think most of us can relate to your situation, every time the scans come round again. I got a text on Friday, to say mine is next Thursday!! Yes it still has the capacity to really throw you, mind the short notice will mean less worry time!! Then it will be forget it until next year, probably, for the results. Fingers crossed.

So take care all.

Hi Jools63

Hope the walk at the beach was therapeutic . Sounds a lovely way to spend a few hours .

 what a lovely thing to say ! Really lifted me up . My friend passed a few days ago and I am missing her . So nice of you and it means a lot . 

Hope all your scans , you too Gemmary bring some good news . 
I actually asked mum this afternoon if she even has anxiety round scans . She confirmed it’s the withdrawal of them that actually scares her . She sees them as a big safety net but she started from a different position that might be the reason behind that . 
Take care ,

Court 

Fingers crossed for you next Thursday  Gemmary. I don’t think any of us are 100% confident about scans.

The beach was lovely. I went and got a Christmas lights star this afternoon and it’s beautiful. Feeling optimistic and going to try and stay that way. 

Gemmary  Good Luck with your scan on Thursday, hope all is well for you. Sending you a hug.

 Wise words from your mum court, so very sorry about your friend, was it the lady you have mentioned on here a few times?

Jools63, happy you managed a walk on the beach, I have missed seeing the sea so much this year. I am in the Midlands and although I live in beautiful countryside, with lovely walks, there is nothing like a walk on the beach! We have so much planned for next year, covid permitting! 

Bring on the vaccine!

Sleep well all 

xxx