Can’t do right for doing wrong

Hi ,

your story is all to common, it can be really difficult but there are times we need to remember we are not a nurse and our loved ones do have to take some responsibility for themselves - or they will end up in hospital.

It might just help to look at our pages on Looking after someone with cancer and it important for us to remember sometimes we can be the one who needs help or just a little time spent on ourselves so we stand some chance of getting through with some bit of sanity.

Do post on here when you need, someone is always listening.

<<hugs>>

Steve

Hi Lairdy23

 It can get so hard sometimes caring for someone but please don't feel like you are alone. Please remember that while the majority of the time, we all feel like all we are is a carer, but most importantly you are a wife. Try to take some time for you. Even if its just a couple of minutes in the garden. Just wanted you to know you are not alone. Hope everything goes well with the treatment xx

Thanks and you are right Think it is with lockdown too making it seem a lot harder to get my own time but with some of restrictions lifted at least I can visit my family friends at  a social distance now x

Thank you you are right and I’ll try to get a bit of time to self restrictions have eased a bit so at least I can visit my friends and family at a social distance x

I do sympathise with you. My husband has the same diagnosis and they tell us he should eat little and often but if I say,  shall I get you something to eat, he says I am nagging. Sometimes you can’t win. I don’t enjoy cooking and now he sees meals as a chore it is soul destroying. I wrack my brains over what to make that he can eat and he sits down with sighs and groans. 

I didn’t realise before just how much enjoyment we get from eating out with friends or without. As they say, you don’t know what you’ve got until you lose it!

Your are totally right ,you feel guilty sometimes when you are eating and he’s only getting soup and pudding at moment .My 2teenage Girls and I enjoy our weekend takeaway as at moment with lockdown there isn’t much else to do.His Radiotherapy treatment finished yesterday I think he’s feeling bit of side effects today said didn’t sleep so well last night he is really tired and in a low mood .Fingers crossed things improve and he feels a bit more himself in a few weeks his throat is sore and swollen glands.Hope things improve for you and your hubby at least we can talk on here sometimes it easier with non family member take care x