My dad passed away today. He was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer in April 2019 and told he had about a year, with treatment. He got 7 months.
He was in hospice his final 10 days and being well cared for, but he had been ready to leave for most of that time. In his final 5 days he was heavily sedated, but when he would wake up all he would say is "I'm done. I'm dead. It's time, I'm ready. Let's go, I'm ready." He was exhausted and just wanted peace.
I would phone the hospice every morning for an update on how his night went, and I was constantly worried sick that he was in pain or distressed despite sedation. I know the hospice provided better care than I could at home, but I still worried.
All this to say I'm heartbroken but... relieved. He wanted to go and I hated seeing him cling on knowing how exhausted he was. I actually felt helpless not being able to make it easier for him. I hope he's at peace.
