Hi all,
My amazing wife is currently in critical care, recovering from huge surgery to remove a number of tumours from her abdomen. We're incredibly close and this experience is making me realise how much I rely on her for my emotional support. I'm really struggling to get through this without that there.
Her op went well but there was more disease than expected which has shaken both of us. Now we're waiting on tests to see if she needs chemo and more critically, assess the likelihood of it returning. If no cells are found in the fluid, there's a low chance, if cells are found, it's more likely to return, I don't know how likely.
I'm so terrified for the results, we have to wait a few more weeks and I'm not sure how many more rounds of bad news I can deal with and ultimately i'm terrified that this is going to come back and I'm going to lose her. We're both 35 and the thought of losing this amazing person who has totally changed my life for the better is devastating. I'm finding it so hard to adjust to her not being home even for this short time.
I know I'm hypothesising and that I'm imagining the worst case scenario, but right now it feels like too much of a possibility. Sorry for the ramble I just don't know who to turn to. Friends and family are being supportive but I still feel the massive hole.
I know everyone here is also going through hard stuff too, I hope you are all OK.
