Lockdown...

Hi everyone, yes I am sure that the current situation is contributing to the pain of loss you feel. I don't feel it that much at the moment I have to say that this is because I came to be with my parents through this crisis so I am never really on my own. It is doing me very good at the moment but of course I am dreading the time when I will have to go back and how hard it maybe by then to go back to a normal life.

Love to all of you!

Just a quick post.

I like it that lots of you get signs, I do too

The white feather very often seems if I'm  deciding one appears, I take it as a yes. Butterflies they seem to follow me around. If I  go outside particularly to do something I belive she told me about, its like they check up on me.

Take care, I'm slowly moving forward, will never stop loving her, missing her, but I do so much more now than I ever thought I could.

Gary

Morning Gary and all

Thank you for your post, it gives me hope that life won't always be this bleak.

I am definitely a "cup half full" type of person and got up today trying to be positive but have already had tears whilst walking my dog. Beautiful day, beautiful sunshine, always makes me smile but not today, couples everywhere walking their dogs, chatting and I am alone. I have this gut wrenching pain that I just can't shift, I miss him so much. Not only am I struggling with this new life but I'm struggling with this new me, I don't like her, she"s a right misery!

I think the shock of Mark's death is wearing off now and reality is setting in. I keep seeing little flashbacks of him or things he's said. Memories, memories......its all just too painful. 

He said he would watch over me,  but I've had no signs so I think he's just moved on and forgotten me.

Sorry for moaning, just feeling sorry for myself and for all of us in same situation.

Ali x

Hi Ali I don't know if you belive in the other side but a few videos on YouTube phill quinn is a good one to explain why your not getting signed which might be a little help to you at least he explained it in layman's terms  hope it helps 

Hi Ian,

Thank you for replying. I think I did watch Phil Quinn on you tube in the very early days as someone on here mentioned it, but to be honest don't really remember anything he said, don't think I was taking much in at that time. Perhaps I'll have another look.

I kind of believe in the other side as I lost my mum 30 years ago and I always like to think that maybe she's watching over me and I'll see her again, it's a way of coping I suppose,  she was very young, like Mark. I have always felt cheated out of my Mum, now hubby too!

Ali x

H Ali 

I heard a saying we live in hell when we die we go to heaven so I have to believe one day I will walk in pastures green and will be again with are loved ones  and are families again all together in peace  

take care 

martin x