hiya all ..first the good news ..after 10 long years me and my other half are getting married in july ..can't bleeding wait . then the bad stuff , i was diagnosed with secondry cancers over xmas in my pelvis and my liver , went to see a new lot of consultants last wednesday and they all say the same that i'm too ill for chemo and they can only try and keep me pain free . finding it very hard to comprehend , i'm 38 years…
well people ( in general family, friends , medical professionals ) are now talking to me like i already have 1 foot in the grave , not a plesant time and doesn't fill me with confidence . everybody seems to have that low , depressed tone to their voice and are suddenly talking to me like i'm 3 . i have a little problem thinking at the momment , probably due to lack of sleep ..or just being thick !
anyway can…
and wake me from this nightmare :(
today i went to see the surgens , news isn't good , yes the cancer is back for the 3rd time confirmed by pet scan today , the also shows it hasn't spread ....
they want to get me in on the 29th for removal of the bladder and vagina and maybe removal of the bowel depending on the scar tissue ..he said i had a 1 in 5 chance of this working ..if it doesn't then it will all happen…
well this little bugger refuses to give up and die ..i don't mean me by the way ! the cancer . today i got a call from the hospital to say a 5mm mass has been found in the same place ( vaginal ) and they are treating it as a reaccurance ....part of me is releaved i knew something was wrong and people kept on telling me it can't come back so quickly so part of me is like told ya so . i don't know its all so horrid…
well i feel like i've had to do a lot of detective work , trying to figure out whether the big c has come back ! 8 weeks ago i had a vlear mri and a clear pet scan ( yipee) !!!and put into total remission . about 2 weeks ago i started feeling crappy again , alot more pain and pain when i'm sitting and going to the loo , also been getting a yellowy discharge which is quite unusual . so i spoke to the gyne nurse…
