Neck Radiotherapy difficulty eating - my partner

Hi variety

Sorry he’s got himself into such a corner. 
People deal with adversity in different ways and he sounds as if he is really internalising his pain and fear

Is there any way you can get him to his GP? He might benefit from antidepressants? It’s just a thought. 
I suppose trying to convince him he needs food to heal might sound like nagging to him but the more weight he loses the longer he is going to be ill and unable to eat. 
when is his next hospital check up? 
If it’s soon you might be able to hang on in the hope that they will admit him, because they probably will. 

Good evening variety, im afraid he must be persuaded to drink these protein drinks otherwise he might have to go into hospital and go on a drip or have a feeding tube fitted. As Dani said it might be worthwhile asking for anti-depressants as in my experience they do help, he cannot keep relying on Pepsi Max as it will do him no good at all. I know what its like not being able to eat as i have had a PEG feeding tube since 2009 so my food supplement goes through that. It might be best to stop trying to eat and concentrate on the food supplement if it is causing so much hassle. If you click on my name at the top in green it will give you a quick insight into my journey with head and neck cancers and show that with a lot of determination you can get through it. If you can please contact his dietician or nurse, if not Tesco and Morrisons sell powders or drinks like complain which will be a good start as its bank holiday weekend, this will stop him struggling so much. I know its not easy but he must try to get some nourishment inside him. Wishing you both all the best ,take care.

                                                                               Chris x 

Hi Variety

So sorry to hear about the struggle your partner is having since his surgery and radiotherapy. It is very hard when you are unable to help no matter what you try.

I also had issues with depression after my first operation and radiotherapy in 2013. I was grieving over what could have been and having to adjust to a whole new way of life. Also struggling with a very painful mouth and difficulty eating. It all combined to making me feel very down for quite a while.You also start thinking of your mortality and things can look a bit grim then.

I lost  10 kgs during my first course of radiotherapy but with the help of protein drinks managed to put a lot of it back on over time.

The good news is that over time I did get back on my feet and adjust to the new normal but it did not happen over night.

I found the support of my family and husband and care team really helped.

If pain is an issue for your partner I found regular panadol a real help combined with top ups of liquid morphine. I was also on Fentanyl patches. Do not discount the value of the panadol regularly as this really did make a big difference.

Your partner really needs to get some help and you might need to persuade him more forcefully to seek it from your doctor.

As already mentioned your partner may need to go back into hospital to have a naso gastric feed put in as this will really help him with his nutrition. He may have already had one when previously in hospital. This is also an opportunity for the dietician to become involved and help your partner try out some different foods and if pain is an issue they will help him with that.

Hang in there you are doing a great job supporting your partner and with time things will start to improve you just have to be patient which is very hard.

Best wishes and hope things start improving for you both soon.

Lyn

Hi sorry to hear this he really really needs food and hydration he feels so ill his body is full of radiation and it keeps working forcweeks he needs to drink the drinks or he will suffer. I had a n g tube in week 3 for 45 days in total so maybe he needs to re think and get in touch with nurse or asap .He can’t survive on Pepsi. Sorry to be blunt but we’ve been there and done it !it really is a pain but if he eats and drink s he will recover quicker as loosing weight is not good.

keep in touch Hazel x