Struggling, can’t stop crying. Feel like no light at the end of the tunnel!

  • 47 replies
  • 292 subscribers
  • 3296 views

Diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer in November. So far I have had 4 of my PC treatments and 2 immunotherapy (I had reactions to both paclataxil and pembro) and I am struggling with anxiety.

I can’t stop crying and can’t see an end to all this. I have another 8 of these treatments then 4 EC cycles before surgery and then more radiotherapy/chemo/immunotherapy.

Ive heard EC is worse than PC and I’m struggling with this. I don’t know if I can cope! Even the 6 months to surgery seems a million miles away.

I have a fiance and good support network but I feel so lonely like nobody understands what I’m going through and I’m just sitting each day willing the day away.

I spoke to MacMillan but didn’t feel like I got a lot from it. They told me what I’m feeling is normal and not to be so hard on myself etc but I know all this but don’t know how to deal with my emotions and get through it. I am usually a strong person and don’t know what’s happened to me, all I do is mope and cry Cry 

How do I get through this?!

  • I’m 2 days post infusion but v tired and fatigued. Worried I’m a little nauseous and my anti sickness tablets stop today. So worried about feeling really poorly and for how long?! Surely not the full 3 weeks?! X

  • I was advised by my oncology nurse that I could take the anti-sickness tablets for longer than needed, so worth calling them. I ended up taking them for 10 days x

  • Which were you on? I’ve only got 3 days of stronger one then a week of metaclop. Would they put more up for me to collect do you think if I’m nauseous after my last dose today? X

  • What are the stronger ones you ard on?

    I was on metaclopramide for the first 4 days post EC (I was told I could take 4 rather than 3 a day when they weren't effective), then I moved to cyclizine on the 5th day, which I stopped needing on day 11. The nausea hasn't gone completely but, whilst it feels counterintuitive, nibbling on trusty crystallised ginger and plain crackers/biscuits as soon as I wake up and as needed during the day has really helped.

    I have my 2nd EC next week and they have talked about another anti-sickness I can try (sorry, sure of the name of that) x

  • I’ve got 7 days metaclopramide and 3 days apprepitant (I’ve taken my last one this morning).

    got an appointment next Friday as think I’ve felt another lump so really want to be well enough to go to it. X

  • Sounds like you are on a longer course than me, but worth contacting them to check if still nauseous, as it's really not nice is it!

    Sending hugs and I'll keep everything crossed you can get to your appointment and get checked out xx

  • How long did the tiredness last? Did you have a period of feeling relatively well in between infusions? I’ve just been stuck in since Wednesday and it’s driving me mad but don’t feel up to anything other than a short walk!

    Mother in law invited us for tea but not sure as there will be 4 people there though they are all currently well. Weighing up the pros and cons of infection risks vs emotional wellbeing! X

  • I had 12 weekly sessions of paclitaxel and was tired most of the time,  it got worse for the last 3 sessions. 4 weeks ater fnishing I am gradually recovering.  My legs are still wobbly though, so I walk with a stick.  But I can walk 2 miles now. xxx

  • Glad you are starting to feel better. 
    did you have EC? how were you on that?

    I found paclitaxel ok but struggling with EC and only had it on Wednesday- very fatigued/tired/weak and wobbly and light headed and also nauseous despite strongest anti sickness meds. Not sure if due to bad taste in my mouth though . It’s horrid and am hoping it won’t last the full 3 weeks! Need a break! X

  • Hi Monty45 - I'm due to start Docetaxel x 3 3 weeks apart next week after the same regime of EC. I found EC OK and have managed to carry on pretty well but am dreading the next 3 cycles. When you say you found it much harder can I ask in what way?