Arghhh

Ok  firstly Breathe. ......... Welcome to the club no body wants to belong to but once here realise best place to come to for support and answers from people who know how you feel ..we've been there !

So sorry about the loss of your mum in law then to get the news nobody wants . My story is on my profile just click on my name to read . 

We're all scared when we get on this rollercoaster but believe me when I say things do get better once you on your treatment plan .

I had MX 8 days after diagnosis then two weeks later got told HER2+ ( who ever knew there were so many different types )  I finished chemo a year ago and finish Herceptin ( drug for Her2) end of this month . It's not been fun some days but I am still here you are stronger than you thing we all are . Use this site to talk ,rant, scream , laugh yes you will laugh because you need to .

Im sure you children will be upset but cope and help you so when you can sit with them and let them know what is happening so they can help support you .

Have a look around the threads lots of info about treatments that can help also chatty threads like walking back to happiness or if you're not sleeping the Awake site is very busy and most nights and thru the day you can find people to chat to also lots of threads to read and laugh at .More importantly lots of experience on Awake from people who have finish treatment and people just starting .

This waiting is the worst time honestly friends and family don't know what to say ( including hubby ) and we can get a little bit stressed by what they say this is the place where we can come to to vent about what was said lol I had a ex colleague say to me "you don't look ill " my response that day was " you don't look stupid " 

At the moment try not to look too far forward concentrating on what might or might not happen that can be a waste of energy .Concentrate on now one day / step at a time .please come on the site and do what you've done tonight and spit it out it does us all good and someone is always here to listen. 

Thank you Margaret. I was told I needed a lumpectomy but then asked if I WANTED a mastectomy.  Surely not my decision x

Read my story I made decision for Mx then had surgeon asking if I was sure won't repeat story but different factors taken into account for me at my age I just wanted rid of cancer with no risk of going back for further surgery if margins weren't clear from a lumpectomy. My cancer was 51mm over the size when lumpectomy offered but I have lge cup size so he felt able to do lumpectomy. I got second biopsy to confirm size to confirm I wanted MX . At that point he felt cancer was non aggressive and possibly no chemo needed .

Two weeks after surgery the results came in grade 3 aggressive Her2+ so then needed chemo . Followed by Herceptin .

If you feel that you need more info to get your head around any decision you need to make then ring your BCN . My surgeon explained he had to be sure I accepted what was the result of my op . To be honest think he was quite shocked how determined I was . 

Did he explain in words you could understand what Her2 + is ? 

I'll ring my BCN tomorrow x

Good don't worry about pestering your BCN is there for you to listen to surgeon and make sure you have all the knowledge you need . She Should answer any queries you have about what surgeon has said write a list of questions so you don't forget .

You didn't mention lymph nodes were they clear ? 

Do you know what size is the area of op .

What do you understand about Her2  ?  I was given a very clear description in plain English . 

My lymph nodes were clear. Her2 wasnt fully explained but I checked this site for information. They didnt give me a size,  just said its 'small' Size will be added to my questions for tomorrow x

small is good I was told by Onco if I had a rogue cancer cell then Her2 could attach and would rapidly divided and multiply the cell that is why herceptin is used after the chemo as belts and braces . The research shows a great success rate with this treatment . One lady on here was still posting 13 years after diagnosis .

try to get some sleep  it does get easier honest 

I'm only 55, 13 years being seen as good has made me cry

 She still here and absolutely fine sorry didn't mean to upset you any further The lady has no intention of going anywhere and is enjoying her life .

I was wanting to reassure you that there are treatments and they work! I certainly don't feel as if I'm going anywhere

soon x

Hopefully you'll feel a bit better after talking to your BCN tomorrow 

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I know you didnt Margaret, my head is all over the place tonight xx