I’m so scared- just been told I’ve got cancer

Hi , sorry you have joined this group, I know it’s the last place any of us ever thought we would be! I was diagnosed at 38years old. I’m now 45 and have been living with a Secondaries diagnosis for the last almost 5years! 

Sounds like you have been given a treatment plan, although I will give you a heads up and say don’t be surprised if plans change! Sometimes when they find out the type of cancer they can change the treatment plan. They might go for Chemo then surgery for example! So just be prepared that this can ‘sometimes’ happen! 

This site and particularly this group is full of great support and advice! So please ask anything, never feel as if your question sounds stupid. Because I’ll guarantee you we’ve all asked most questions! If I was to give you one piece of advice, it would be to take each day as it comes! Don’t look too far ahead and allow yourself to feel whatever it is you need too! Some days you will cry, some you will feel numb, some days angry and some days you’ll forget about your diagnosis and enjoy a giggle with your family/friends! Yes that is allowed and although you won’t believe me right now, it is possible to laugh still! 

If you can’t sleep, there is a thread called AWAKE and usually there’s someone on there to chat too, or there are pages and pages of things to look through! It’ll keep you entertained for hours or send you to sleep.....see it’s a win win!! 

Give yourself time for things to sink in and remind yourself that breast cancer is VERY treatable! It’s a tough rollercoaster of treatment and emotions. But you will get through it and because you have posted on here, you’ll do it with a whole bunch of new online friends, right behind you, every step of the way! 

Welcome to the group Hun. Look forward to getting to know you. Sal xxxx

Hey! I am sorry to hear that you have been bombarded with what seems, to you, negative information. Yes, it is scary...but soon you will have a plan in place and that really does help. Feel free to read my bio. All I can say is this is the really scary part....it does get better...with a plan in place you are able to move forward. Highly recommend the Awake Club....up all hours and there’s always someone to hand!

My advice? Keep talking....anything....really anything....we are here and will do our very best to support you! 

Hi Luce007

So sorry you have found yourself here. Everyone on this forum knows how you are feeling - it truly is the scariest and most emotionally distressing thing to happen. I was diagnosed several weeks ago and my emotions are still very raw but I have taken great comfort from the voices of experience on here who assure us that everything does get easier once a plan is in place and treatment starts. 
Although the diagnosis and what may or may not happen still dominate my thoughts most of the time I have gradually noticed that I can think of or concentrate on other things for longer periods - a couple of minutes in a day at first but gradually and almost unnoticed a little longer. 
As everyone says, take one day at a time, listen to the medical advice and get whatever support you personally need. Good luck and hope your treatment soon starts and goes very well

Hi there Luce007.

My reply is basically what has already been said. It's scary looking into the unknown, but soon it won't be. You will have a plan. Make sure you ask questions if there's anything you don't understand. The plan will be tailored to your individual needs. Everyone's experience is different because you are unique. Take each day as it comes, but learn as you go along what is best for you. Concentrate on the now. 

Hi Luce007,

The worst bit is the first few weeks as you get used to the idea - I was diagnosed in Jan 2015 and spent the first weeks thinking that this was the last time I'd see the spring snowdrops coming up.Lots of tears and sleepless nights, but as the others have said it gets (a little) easier when you have a treatment plan.

Thought you might like to know that my initial diagnosis was as bad as yours - 5.5cm tumour, grade 3, and 5 of 16 lymph nodes affected. (I remember each time they gave me some new information about my cancer where there were different levels of bad news, I always seemed to get the worst end of the scale). However I was really lucky when they did the scans to check if it had already spread, as (other than a shadow on the lung, which turned out to be OK) my scans were all clear.

I had surgery followed by chemo and rads, bisphosphonates for 3 years to reduce chance of recurrence in bones, and am now on Letrozole to try to prevent recurrence everywhere.

And after 5 years I'm still here, and (as far as I know) cancer-free. And it doesn't fill my thoughts like it did 5 years ago.

Hope this helps - I know when I was diagnosed I wanted to hear from people who had it as bad as me and were still here a few years later.

Wishing you a successful treatment and a long and happy life.

Nic

Hi scared_2.  I hope that Luce007 can feel a bit more positive after reading your response. I know that I certainly do. Although we all know that nowadays there are huge numbers of successful outcomes and that breast cancer is in no way the dread that it once was It is so helpful to read personal stories with such positivity. I am so pleased that you have been able to see the beautiful snowdrops for several years more than you feared and hope that you will be watching them come up for many more years. I am hoping the same for myself with the beautiful autumn leaves 

Yes, i was told that I had cancer and that I would be having chemo and then a mastectomy, only to be told by the oncologist that I had the sort that didn't respond to chemo so I am looking at a  mastectomy first possibly followed by radiotherapy.  I only had my CT scan today so all that may change if they find something sinister elsewhere.  I had been making 'plans' in my head for them only to be useless because everything has changed.  As everyone has said, we are all here to support each other and please don't rely on research from 'Dr Google'.

What a story that gives me hope. I was told during the scan I have the smallest lump that she have ever seen she said that my under arms lymph nodes does not seem to be infected I think she said. I’ll find out next week after biopsy results but I am struggling.

Hi Lesley63 Sorry to hear that you don't yet have a definite plan. I think we have to learn to 'go with the flow' but it isn't easy, is it and constantly waiting for results doesn't help. Hope your CT was clear. How long do you have to wait to hear? I had a CT as I knew from the start that I had node involvement and I was fortunate as my BCN pushed to get the results through the next day. I do hope that you soon know exactly what treatment you are looking at and can get on with it. 

Hi Alexy. So incredibly difficult waiting for the results. But you have a huge positive there if you such a small lump. Just keep focusing on that and remember that breast cancer is extremely treatable. The word is still scary but we are in a totally different situation than we would have been some years ago. I am still very much a 'newbie' to this experience but I am determined to remain as positive as I can - not easy at times but I am doing my best and the support of people on here is a huge help. Good luck!