An unimaginable situation has become reality. I do indeed have breast cancer. I am also pregnant. I need to end the pregnancy though in order to keep me alive 
They need to do a CT to see what stage I’m at, but they won’t do a CT while I’m pregnant. They said at the moment it’s curable, but if I don’t treat straight away, it may not be.
Their recommended course of treatment WAS going to be 6 rounds of chemotherapy, an operation to remove the tumor, radiotherapy if needed, then 5 years of some cancer drug.
However I can’t have a CT. I can’t have chemo or an operation to remove anything until I’m at least 12 weeks. So they are completely blind. If I choose to keep the baby, they can’t operate to remove the tumor before 12 weeks because of the anaesthetic. Which means another 6 weeks of fast growing cancer attacking me and spreading god knows where...
What they do know is the cancer I have is an oestrogen fed one, and my body is absolutely flooded with oestrogen with all the pregnancy hormones. This will make the cancer bigger and spread faster than normal. The pregnancy will basically kill me. The only way of giving me a chance to survive is to terminate the pregnancy, and throw everything they have at it :(
Fertility may be shot afterwards, so our chance of having a baby together may be gone (i’m 38). I can pause the cancer drugs to try for a year if I want... but it’s all unknown.
They said that the lump appeared so large and so fast because of the changes happening inside me, so as much as this sucks, the way we’re looking at it is that maybe the baby actually saved me. How long would it have been growing and spreading under the radar...?
I found out the lump “might” be cancer on the Friday (last day of term), took a pregnancy test on the Saturday to make sure we weren’t pregnant that month so we could stop trying until everything was clear and sorted, but I was positive 5 days early.
So have had 2 weeks of hell in our minds, wanting to be excited but knowing this outcome may happen.
We are both completely heartbroken but there is only one decision. My health has to come first and the 2 children I already have
We had the most lovely Consultant who was in tears with us. We have to go back and see her on Tuesday with our final decision and she will get everything moving.
This is shit :(
