Hi
I'm here to lookbfor support and understanding.
I am still madly in love. We share everything. Now I feel I need to keep a few things to myself so he can remain strong and ready for his first chemo.
He thinks i am strong. But I went to my gp and got meds. I take them before going to see him.
He is in hospital since first aymptoms because his pain cannot be managed with oral meds. It's so hard to only be able to see him once a day.
He does the same. My rock my protector takes the meds that work best just before I visit.
He proudly shows mecthat he is better bcs now they give him this drug and they increased his patch and it breaks me bit by bit bcs it just ahows how advanced the disease is.
He's due to be moved to a different hospital to start chemo. Once pain is managed we hope he will be able to come home.
How will I remain the strong and composed front?
Yesterday I cried in the supermarket. Just uncontrolled sobbing.
Afternoons are worst when our teens are back from school. Luckily they have devices and love spending time on them. I'm such a bad mom not spending more quality time with kids. We just eat together really. They do help with chores.
We didn't ask how much time we have. We didn't want to know. Whatever it is, it's short.
I never imagined that I could love like this. And the pain. His breakthrough pain episodes. I was lucky I only saw 2. How will I help him if those happen at home.
What do you do? How do you cope?
Hi and welcome to the Online Community, although I am sorry to see you finding us and so sorry to hear about your husband.
A cancer diagnosis can bring a lot of stress, confusion and questions on........ but talking with people who are on the same journey can help a lot.
Can I direct you to this link to our very supportive Pancreatic cancer group as this will open up your concerns to a wider audience who know exactly what you are going through at the moment.
Just follow the link I have created then hit the ‘Join This Group’ tab just under the main group name, then go to the 'Start a Discussion' tab and set up your very own Discussion and introduce yourself to the group and ask your questions.
As I was the person with the cancer my experience of supporting someone is very limited, although my wife has been amazing over my 20 years. I see that you have posted in our Carers Only group - this will be a good place where you can connect with others support family through their cancer journey but more importantly the carers care for each other.
You may find our various Macmillan Support Line Services to be helpful - call them on 0808 808 00 00 This free service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00 but check the link.
We also have our ‘Ask an Expert’. section where you can post questions to our mostly Volunteer Experts but please allow 2 working days to get a reply.
Our Online Information and Support Section is a good place to find information covering cancer diagnosis, treatments and pages covering most types of cancers.
Talking to people face to face can help a lot so check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area or a Maggie’s Centre as these folks are amazing.
When you feel up to it try putting some information in your profile. This really helps others when answering. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. Just click on YOUR username, select 'Edit Profile'. Put as much or as little in your profile and you can amend it at any time - you can see members profiles by hitting our forum names.
All the very best.
