My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Thinking of you today Ailsa. Take care of yourself. It is a lovely sunny day and I hope you get some time to sit and remember all the 'good' times you and Chris shared x x x

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Huge ((((((((((hugs)))))))))) for Ailsa today

Just dropping in to say I am thinking of you today Ailsa, and to say thank you for starting this thread that has bought comfort to so many of us... I can’t begin to imagine how my life would be now without all the lovely penguins. So I am sending you much love and massive virtual hugs until I can pass on a couple of real ones next weekend. Hope that today passes as painlessly as possible and that you manage to find some peace and a few smiles too...

And I’ll just say a quick hello to everyone else – I don’t post often anymore, but I drop in every few days and catch up with you all and think of you often. Hope that you are all getting by as best you can.

I sincerely hope life for you has improved and you are starting to remember the good times more. The pain never goes away, but lessens as we all move on through life together.

Oh Ailsa, I can only reiterate what Manda has said.  You have been a great comfort to a lot of people and you can be so proud of that. I was in such a dark place when I found your post and it has really helped me over the months.

I hope today is passing as best it can and want you to know that I am thinking of you.

Lots and lots of big ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))) for you my friend x

Pammie xx

Dear Ailsa

i just wanted to send you big, big hugs for today, and well done for all the decorating.xx

I have just returned from spending a few days in Cornwall with my mother, and found a letter telling me that Alan's best mate 'oop north' has died of lung cancer 3 months after diagnosis.    i hope they are enjoying a pint of best together.    xx

Oh Sue  - I'm so sorry to hear about your friend (well Alan's friend!)

Love and (((((hugs))))) to you

Dot xxxx

hi all

I haven't posted for a while again because work seems to be making me all tired and the short weeks and going away last weekend to my parents and having my parents to me this weekend.

I just wanted to send big hugs to ailsa again today, take care of yourself.

I am ill for the first time since I lost Mark! It is only a cold, but will really mess up my jogging training and with only 2 weeks to go. Its also another first alone, shitty this isn't it.

anyway big hugs to you all wether you need them or not (as they are cyber hugs there is no danger of passing on the germs!)

Becky

Hello everyone,

So sorry I haven't been around for what feels live forever and I have missed you all loads.   I have been reading regularly but just felt able to post for whatever reason I don't know.  I have had a really difficult few weeks where I hit rock bottom.  Not even to do with Wully but just life in general where I have realised that I have let things get out of control and not been looking after myself emotionally.  I was in hospital on Thursday and now starting to feel a lot better and hopefully put it all behind me and move on.  Just made me have a long hard look at how I am living my life and things have to change.  It was 6 years ago that Wully was diagnosed on 02-05-2005 and what a rollercoaster life has been since then as we have all had. 

Ailsa, I have been thinking of you this weekend and hope you are doing okay.  Becky, hope you feel better soon and Rosemary the wedding sounded fantastic and I hope you are not feeling too flat after all the build up as I am sure it was taking up most of your time and thoughts before. 

We got a new kitten on Saturday and that has cheered us all up.  I have always wanted a siamese and was going to get it for my 30th but life wasn't easy at that point so we never did it.  I've been looking for a few months and finally saw one but it was in England (about 2.5hrs drive) so we went and made a day of it.  Ewan is brilliant with her and I was worried he was going to put her in his bag this morning to take to his grans lol.  Jamie is scared of her though and no wonder.  I got the hoover out this morning and thought she would run a mile as she is so tiny and she attacked it.  Even poor Billie wasn't allowed in the kitchen this morning as she had barred the door!

Anyway take care penguins and sending you all lots of love and hugs xxxxx

Evening everyone.  Thank you all for your messages & hugs today.  Every one of them has kept me afloat.  The kids have all been round and so have my parents.  It is so lovely that they all care so much but I am truely shattered now.  I did a bit more decorating but Stu has been doing some plastering he has been promising to do for a while so my house looks like a bombsite again.  Sometimes I just think this is all too much for one person to keep up to.  I hate the mess but I am sure it will be worth it once I get cleared up again.  Chris would love it and to be fair, so do I.

Becky I am sorry you are not feeling well.  It is really awful the first time you are ill on your own.  Look after yourself so you are well enough for your race.

Gayle I hope you really are okay.  It is lovely to hear from you.  The pictures of the kitten are so cute.  Even I am tempted to get a kitten after looking at them.  It is really quite funny that she is so brave.

Thank you Pam, Bren, Manda, Dot, Quill & Sue for your messages.  Thanks also to Graham.  I really hope I haven't missed anyone as I don't know what I would have done in the past 2 years if it hadn't been for you all being there.  I am back at work tomorrow when I really feel like I need a few more days off but heyho, you can't have everything.  Take care everyone xxx