My husband - Chris - died on the 2nd May 2009 because he had anal cancer. He knew he was going and we spoke about lots and lots of things before he died. That is why I am just not prepared for the huge amount of guilt I feel now. I feel guilty that the world hasn't stopped turning round even though he has died. I feel like everything should stop as a mark of respect. I also feel very guilty that he had to be so ill he had to die. What a cruel cruel thing it is to make someone so ill their body just stops working. I wasn't ready for him to go. I really really hope these are normal feelings because I must hang on to my sanity for the sake of my 3 children. I have never known sadness like I feel right now. I can't believe that I will not hear his voice or feel his touch again. We were married for almost 32 years and I have known Chris for 34 years - since I was 16. What happens now? Ailsa
Hi Rosemary
We must have posted at same time, if we were all closer it would be great and we could all put the wold to rights couldnt we lol!!
A glass and watching the sunset sounds like heaven! See you later
Helen xx
Oooh, yes just missed you Helen. Big hug m'dear and I will get the kettle on for you rather than a glass of vino, where are you planted in this country or ours - another northerner? Well done with this weekend, look back on your good memories with fondness and they will help you through the horrible others. xxxxxxxxxx
Thanks Rosemary
I m North West in Merseyside, so yes another Northener lol xx
Lets hope that we all have a better week than Ambrose ( He is napoleon's cousin.)
Sue xx
Evening everyone. The pictures are great again Sue - made me smile. Rosemary - love the thought of tea and the sunset and setting the world to rights. Shuffle round on the ledge, I'm on my way out!
Lynne please send me a pm and tell me what plan g really is!!
Well done on the roast Helen. I have cooked a couple of times in the past few weeks so have had a day off today.
Hello to everyone else. I haven't made notes tonight so I am sorry if I miss things. I am supposed to be getting ready for Liverpool in the morning. We are leaving at 9 and I haven't even got my bags down from the loft. I have done my usual and planned far too many jobs this weekend and now I will have to stay up too late trying to get them done. I finished spraying all the wood in the garden and I have sprayed the bench. I have been to see my brother in law about the work Chris wanted me to do in the garage and I think I have a kind of plan. I've treated the lawn and been for a walk with a friend so now if I have a shower and do the ironing and packing I will be ready for bed and then I can relax and enjoy my hols tomorrow. I don't suppose I will get to a computer while I am away so I will catch up with you all on Wednesday.
Bren, hope you are okay. You are doing really well sorting out Dan's tools. I still have things like to do. Take care.
I hope everyone has a decent week. Look after yourselves. Ailsa xxx
Ailsa have a great time. You ll be so close to me, but think of me while I m at work lol
Helen xxx
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