My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Hi All ,   Big Big hugs to all of you that are feeling down , i know the feeling well , hopefully this bad phase will pass soon , Lesley glad to see you posting again , Bren , we've all been a bit like "whats the point in cooking for one" i am getting a little better now (not much) but you do have to take care of yourself ..

  I have booked the full week off in september so which ever one we go to i will be able to come yippee .. 

  I have had a fairly good week , i think i am still on a high from the weekend , even when i got the ambulance kinda stuck somewhere it didn't want to go i was still laughing and not getting upset , my boss has been to look at the place today and said she is not sendind ambulances ther again , only cars phew !!! . This all came on the day that we got our driver evaluations , we had been monitered through feb  , millage , speed , and lots of other things that are out of your control really like waiting times , we didn't know we we're being moniterd and i was very pleased to have come 7th out of 26 , but then someone poined out i was top in all the women , how pleased was i , sorry if you think i'm bragging but i am really really pleased , if i hadn't sped a few times i would have been higher , must keep my foot off the accecerator lol ..

Whats everybody up to tis weekend , i haven't got any plans but hopefully that will change .. Sorry i havent mentioned everybody but i think about you all the time .. Take care xx I'll be back later xxxx

Aww Lynne - well done - see Gordon was right when he said you would be good at that job!!!

Hugs to everyone who is struggling this week and I hope the weekend brings some improvement.

I have had a funny day today.  Ewan got sent home from nursery yesterday as he has conjunctivitis so he was home today so took him shopping.  Like I have said on previous posts I don't think he really remembers his daddy but out of the blue we were driving along and he said to me you need to buy daddy a car.  So I said daddy doesn't need a car and he asked if that was because he was an angel?  He then told me he had told his nursery teachers that his daddy was an angel.  Well I really had to fight back the tears as we had just arrived at the shopping centre.  Where do they come up with these things?  We then had a nice time looking in the shops and having lunch where we were even having a normal conversation lol.  He is so grown up at times and other times he is like a terrible 2 year old!

I am having a very early night tonight as it has been a very long week with work.  Tomorrow night I am going out for a nice meal with a friend who is going away for 4 months so he wants to treat me so looking forward to that and even bought a new dress today for the occasion (like I really need a new dress!!). 

Hope you all have an okay weekend.

Gayle xxx

Aw`Gayle your boys would have me in tears all the time , bless em , i cant wait to meet them . You have a good time tommorow night , and you enjoy your early night and if tommorow is anything like last fri (7am ) your going to need it  Speak soon xxxx

Good evening, everyone

All i can say is thank god it's Friday! The person who invented weekends deserves a medal.

sorry that so many have had a tough week ;  hugs to you all.

My

sister is coming tomorrow with her partner for the weekend, which will be lovely. We're out for a chinese meal tomorrow night. Gayle, you've inspired me - I think some sort of  new clothes  may well be  in order. We're going up to Gloucester on Sunday to see my nephew who is at uni  there; I suspect he will be extremely hungover from Saturday night, but that's students for you!! a few weeks ago my sister received a text from him at 5.15 in the morning; her heart dropped as it's never good news at that time of night. the text read: Mum, I love you. Can I have a meerkat?

He texted back later that morning to apologise - he was on his way home after a night on the tiles and thought that he may have had too much to drink!  Don't you just love them!!!!

have a good weekend

sue xx

Evening everyone.  Well done Lynne, passing your driving evaluation and being the best woman.  I have a quiet weekend planned.  My neighbour has just asked me to hers for lunch on Sunday but otherwise I am having me time.  I might even sit down and watch a film as I have a few to see.

Sorry to hear you have another cold Bren.  You're right about taking more to care to eat properly but I am just the same.  I do it in fits & starts but keep losing interest in trying to cook for one.  But you need to be well for Newfoundland so make that your incentive.

Rosemary you are absolutely right about me ringing you on Thursday.  As I was walking along I did think I should ring one of you but I couldn't think who might be free to talk and then I was just so mad because I couldn't ring Chris I wasn't really thinking about the options.  You sound like you are getting excited about the prospect of Sam & Wayne's wedding.  It will be fun planning it - enjoy!

Fiona I am glad your meal with Kim was nice.  Anniversaries & birthdays don't seem to get any easier, or any fewer do they?

Lesley don't ever worry about posting when you are down.  I have an idea what you were thinking because I was very hesitant about posting when the dental trip made me miss Chris even more but we are all friends on here and here for each other.  Don't do it on your own. 

It is a pity you are still struggling so much with sleep Patricia.  We moved one of our sites today so I think weare within walking distance of Wakefield city centre now - makes it easy if we meet in Wakefield again although I should come your way next time!

Sue that was another good picture for Lesley.  I have tried looking for some good ones but I never find them like you do.

Gayle I have family in Glasgow and am not going to be allowed to be that close without visiting them.  You've made me think about that - I will have to look at the dates again and then make some plans for visiting & seeing John Edwards.

I ned an early night tonight even though I have a quiet weekend planned.  Take care everyone.  Ailsa xxx

Gayle, Ewan sounds lovely.  I think Stuart would have been a bit like him when he was little.  Never seemed to be anything much going on in his head and then just the deepest thing out of the blue.  Get your early night and enjoy your meal tomorrow night.  Like Lynne, I can't wait to meet your boys.  Sleep well.  Ailsa xx

Evening everyone

Lynne well done you!!!

Gayle your boys sound gorgeous!!! xxx Have a lovely time tomorrow night xxx

I have been to a Virgin Vie make up party and treated myself....to some make up and a few glasses of wine lol!!!

Off shopping with Nat tomorrow, looking for prom dresses part 2!!! but hopefully after a lie in!

Have a good weekend everyone, speak tomorrow

Helen xxx

Morning all

Just a quick post to let you all know I am still here! I ahve a busy weekend planned, should keep me from skulling around! Am off into Manchester for girlie shopping day and lunch with Rachel. Wouldn't you just know it's been lovely all week but today, rain  :-(

Then tonight I have my special man sleeping over, can't wait.

Busy day then tomorrow trying to catch up on all the chores I have not had time to do all week.

I am proud to say I have cooked good wholesome meals now for exactly 5 day, round of applause please! No microwave, meat, fish veggies all cooked and eaten. I really enjoyed the meals too, I must keep it up, I enjoy good food. also had two sessions at the pool, so all in all apart from my very sad mood, I have done well this week.

I have been reading all your posts but have felt too sad to post myself, had a massive crying session last night but think I at last feel a bit better today.

I hope you all have a good weekend.

Lynne, thankyou so much for your texts, such a caring lady. xxx

Morning all , so good to have you posting again Lesley , i missed your early morning posts , i'm an early bird too lol . No problem with the texts , just worry when someone is not posting . So good to hear from you too Sue , i was going to message you last night and then you posted , enjoy your weekend . Have fun with the shopping Helen , Nat is a lovely girl , i'm sure3 she could wear a bin bag and look fantastic , like mum like daughter eh ?.. Patricia , i didn't go to mad on the wine i just wanted to sleep too , oh well i had a few hours lol ..

Well i'm determined not to be dragged down but i feel things are working against me , i have been having trouble with the kitchen electric tripping out but its happening all the time now so i'm getting very frustrated with it , i know i'm going to have to get a electritcian in ,and then when the water board came to put my water meter in last night , they couldn't do it till i have my stop cock moved so that means getting a plumber in . I hate getting people in , they never turn up , the job always bigger than it should be , everybody knows i'm thinking of selling so should i just think someone is tryng to tell me something and to get the jobs done and sort things out . Big big thinking going on now .. Maddie is coming soon so she always lifts me . Be back later , have a good day everyone , sorry for the ramble xxxx

Morning!!!

Lesley hope you enjoy your busy weekend xxx And everyone else of course, whatever you re doing x

Lynne hope you get sorted with everything although it sounds like your son has it all in hand. Selling up and travelling does sound tempting though doesnt it, especially the way Judi described it lol!!

Nat looked lovely in everything she tried on so hopefully will find something nice. I have actually worn a bin bag!!!! In the name of fancy dress you understand lol!! Try anything once hee hee!!

Well will be back on later, love to all

Helen xxx