My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Well done on the assessment Lynne x x

Gayle, fingers crossed for ther house sale x x

Ailsa good luck with the plastering etc x x

Fiona the decorating will wait until after the baby arrives x x

Helen and Sue, enjoy the half term you deserve it x x

Judi hope you are ok and not getting too wet walking the dogs x x

Dottee, good luck with the walk x x

I have not been on for a few days because somehow I just could noit face it. Sorry I was selfish and didn't come and offer support to those who needed it.  I am not still not sleeping well so am constantly tired. I guess that I will just have to used to it.

Hope you all have a good evening and everyone else too.

Love and angel hugs x x patricia x x

Ah Patricia , you always offer such good support , you should tell us when your feeling down , its a sad world we're living in at the moment but we all want to be hear for you . Ive shed more tears this week than the last3 put together and that takes some beating , but i hate to think about you feeling so bad you couldn't post . A big hug to you (((((((hug )))))))))) please keep posting xx

Thanks Dottee i'm over it now , well not really but feel better than i did , still lots of tears but looking forward to sunday xx

lynne xxxxxx

Good evening everyone.  I hope you are each having a good evening.  It is raining here but not bad.  How is the rain at your end Judi?  Have you all been washed away yet or has it stopped.  It sounds like Ed & Chris must have been similar when it comes to DIY.  Chris never stopped.  I would just get one mess cleared up and he would start another.  I am just hoping I have learned a lot from him along the way.  Stu has finished the plastering today so I have spent the evening so far cleaning up.  Tomorrow he will do the coving but that won't make nearly so much mess.  I will be able to start painting next week.

Patricia - how are you?  Please don't apologise.  I am so sorry you felt so bad you weren't able to post.  Lynne is right - you offer so much support to each of us on here it would be nice if we could return the favour.  I really hope you are able to sleep better soon.  I don't know what to suggest as we all seem to be different.  I sleep really well most nights but just not for long enough.  That is mostly because I do too much and there is too much going on in my head so once I waken up I can't go back to sleep.  I am usually tired enough to sleep for 5 or 6 hours but then wake up and have to get up.  I hope you figure out what works soon as tired is so dibilitating.

Fiona, thanks for your encouragement with my decorating but I think you definately need to wait until after Kim's baby is here before you try any decorating.

That is good news about the permit for the headstone Lynne.  Do you know when it will go on yet?  I got the receipts from the council for the bench and the plaques today.  I will ring them next week to see when it will be put in place.  The headstone will be the middle of November. Good luck to you and also to Dot & Alan for Sunday and the Ladybower walk.

Gayle have you any news about the house yet?  Have you spotted any reasonable hotels in Newcastle for a get together?

Well I had better get back to a bit more clearing up.  Take care everyone.  Ailsa xx

Hi Aolsa , no i dont have a date yet , hoping its not to long , i might give the headstone place a call tommorow , (i cant remember what you call them ) mental block lol. I'm the same with sleeping , drop off for ahour or 2 then on and off all night , then tired all the next day .xx

Evening xxx

Patricia don`t apologise, just wih we could help more xxx

Ailsa I feel for you, it`s awful when one room is getting done, the whole house is a mess.

Glad you are all getting headstones sorted. I`ve just had Sue round who is the Lay preacher that did Paul`s funeral and is also doing the burial of his ashes next month. We are invited to an `Evening Prayer` on 3rd November which is a remembrance evening and a chance to light  a candle for loved ones.

Hope everyone else is ok, I`ve finished for Half term so can have a lie in tomorrow and looking forward to going away with daughter on Saturday

Talking about sleep I sleep quite well but poor Paul `s mum doesn`t sleep well at all. Really feel for her xx

Night all

Helen xxx

I hope that you all have a good day tomorrow and over the coming weekend. If I am not on line for a few days it is because I am visiting my son over on the Wirral. We are then going to Snowdonia where he is running the Snowden Marathon.

Take care all and remember that I will be thinking about you all. I have a battery operated candle which I will take with me and light for a time in your honour.

Love and angel hugs x x Patricia x x

Oooh don't forget to put your clocks back on Saturday night before you go to bed x x x (one less hour to toss and turn in bed)

You`re getting closer to me going to the Wirral!!

Sorry Patricia it`s an extra hour in bed this time!!

Have a good weekend and good luck to your son

Helen xxx

oh heck so it is x x x  see...........   mush for brains. 

Are you over that way then Helen??

Hi all

Nothing really to tell up here In Aberdeen as the rain hasn't stopped yet.  It is quite incredible with roads closed etc.  The only thing I have done in the last week of any worth was to buy an exercise bike, it folds up (a little) so can be moved out of the way.  I thought that maybe I could do something proactive while I watch tv.  Not quite as good as going to the gym Helen, but little steps.  And if that doesn't work then I can always hang clothes on it.

Love to you Patricia, I am also feeling like you, am getting quite 'twitchy' as it will be a year on Tuesday, but for me Monday because that was the day of the week Ed died.  A couple of weeks ago I really thought that I had got my head round it being no worse than any other day, but it doesn't seem to be the case.  Because of the terrible weather I am able to stay at home, which is best but I am finding myself almost being 'hyper' on the phone if anyone calls, just to make sure they don't worry too much.  I think Lynne, rain or no rain, I will spend a fair bit of the day at the cemetery as it is the only place that makes sense.  I am really trying to see the stars in the dark, but today it's very hard.  

Love to all.  Judi xxx 

Patricia, I`m in Southport which is `over the water!`

Judi I haven`t been to the gym this week!! So you`re doing better than me!

Big hugs for you on your anniversary, I`m coming up for 6 months but can`t believe that time has passed!! Keep looking for the stars

Helen xxx