Ranty rant rant!

I’m with you on the crying every day still, after 13 months, except when I’m to angry to cry!

Heres the rant bit…..

We got a motability car for Valen. We only had it 3 weeks before he went. 
My brother and brother in law had to drive to the hotel in Newmarket we were in, to collect it and take it back to Nissan the day after my beautiful Valen was ripped from me. 
That was 13 months ago. 
I had the confirmation letter that it was back with them. And a refund cheque as we had paid for a year and had it less than a month. 
So lots of letters from both Nissan and Motability. 

2 days ago an email was sent to his email address, addressed to him by name, saying “thank you for having you car (correct reg number) serviced with us. We have informed the RAC that this has been done and updated our records accordingly. We hope you are happy with the service and look forward to your continued customer”.

Im sure you can all imagine very clearly how this made me feel. 
Was the car still in his name? 
What if the new owner did something illegal?
So many spiralling, rabbit hole, scenarios and questions. 
How could they not know he has gone? I have the letters. The refund. 

Anyways, my sister in law was over today and I showed her the email. 
She was bloody furious. And did exactly what I inwardly hoped she would do. Phoned them and gave them a right thrashing.

You see, the real thing was that from the moment I read that email, all I could / can think about is that on the 25th September 2024 my love sat next to me in that car as I drove us to the hotel we were staying in overnight before his chemo. 
And that on the 26th September 2024 I was being driven home without him. And the horror story of life without him started.

Im kinda ok about it now my sister in law has spoken to them (the lady in the head office she spoke to was horrified the email had been sent out) and I can close that door. Mostly. Still residual anger but not so much torment.

Rant over. And breath.

Kate, when you feel right, like wesurvived said. 

MrsVT, 

Sorry you had that trigger. Glad it's been sorted out for you.

I get that Mrs VT.

In 2022 Jay had to put himself forward for our son William's car. William had bad credit rating at the time so Jay put himself up for it as his credit rating was good. He got it on PCP contract. When Jay passed in 2023 I had to let Nissan know that and if they could transfer everything into my name as the contract had only been running for a year. They said they couldn't change the details and the car would remain in his name until the contract was finished but as it was the same bank account the payments were coming from that could still go ahead. Now when statement letters come through each year it reads `to the beneficiary of Mr James Mason` although I gave them my name. I registered the account online with Nissan last week and forgetting put all my contact details to which it wouldn't accept it. Then I remembered I had to enter Jay's details instead and the account comes up James Mason's Quasqui (think that's how you spell it). Still got another year to pay on it but William and myself have set up an agreement that it comes off my account and he pays me back. Still got another year to pay on it and it's beginning to `bite`. He's already looking at another car as seemingly as the contract is a good bit on you can change cars if you want but told him he's on his own this time. 

I hate when people say stu would want you to be happy...yes I know but I'm here alone without him how the f**k can I be happy..I exist..I do stuff to get me through the day not for him.. for survival..

What do they know ? To date, no one has said that to me. Lucky for them. 

I had a phone call Friday from my husbands daughter who lives abroad and actually seldom bothered about her dad and very occasionally called him but did make it over to see him before he died as I told her as it was and understood if she didn’t want to come but had to let her know the situation This was back in May. 
She called me up all nicely at first saying she was checking in on me then it went the other way where she began to speak badly of her father and me. I was quite a bit younger than my husband and she was questioning me on that when we had been through all that years ago she’s never really accepted me. She then started saying she has nothing from her father if her father had wanted to give them something he would have they live a good life abroad. She asked for a crooked old ring he had …I said the only ring I knew about was the one I got him when we got married and it’s on my finger now.  Then started talking about his ex wife her mum, all stuff in the past, I said don’t want to talk about this it’s in the past. I realised soon she had been drinking as was often the case and my husband would say to her look please don’t call me when you’ve been drinking!  If he had a grave he would have been turning in it, I felt bullied, and vulnerable and afraid she upset me so much ,..she said I was being mean my husband walked away from his previous unhappy marriage to live happily with me for 30 years with nothing from his home. I remember him saying his ex was burning his stuff and chucking it out the window.  I told here I was ending the call but didn’t hang up but she was wanting something. After that call I would happily cut ties I know my husband would say ignore her don’t take any notice of her.  

I am so sorry you had to go through that. Your husband would have been upset with her. Don’t let her bully you. Some people hold on to perceived resentments. You know the truth, and that is all that matters. Hopefully, you can find some kind people to spend time with. I am off to the garden centre later today, as I am going to have another “F… It Day.” Sending hugs. Kate. Xxx

I agree with Kate. Please don't be bullied. Hopefully she will not ring you again. This path is hard enough without people like that.

Take care

Kate, I hope you are ok. It does seem to be getting harder.

Take care