29, stage 2 triple negative, single

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Hi all,

I’ve been diagnosed with stage 2 triple negative breast cancer. I’ve not completed all my tests and been given my treatment plan. It’s looking like 6 months chemo, then surgery. 

I am 29, single, live with a friend in the city centre and until a few weeks ago was pretty much living a happy independent life. Im really healthy, slim, eat well, exercise and don’t even drink or smoke! - living a very wholesome life. I’ve now been faced with huge decisions and what seems like my life actually on pause. My identity, my future of family/a partner seems to of been striped away as nobody will want me. I’ve been through some really difficult times in my life already (previous health diagnosis, parent passing away, mental health decline) but I think this is the worse. I’m terrified mostly of my hair falling out and loosing my identity - everyone will see me as the girl who got cancer. 

I’m about to start the process for egg freezing which is bizarre considering I’m single and not thought of kids or even have a partner, but I want to do it for the future me. 

if anyone can offer and support or advice on how to get through this I’d really appreciate it - similar cases or not.

being so young is so difficult but I really hope I can get through this. I do have a great family and friends but I’ve gone from being very independent to now not even wanting to be alone and it’s not even started yet. 

thank you x 

  • Hi Sunflower,

    I’m really sorry to hear about your diagnosis of TNBC, it really is the hugest shock. I was diagnosed with TNBC about 3 weeks ago and I still can’t get my head around how fast things are moving. I keep being told it’s a good thing that it’s moving along so fast but I just haven’t had any time to process things and when I do get time, it’s constant worry and anxiety about literally everything!

    I’m a bit older than you (42) and I was worried about losing my hair and identity too. I start chemo on Tuesday and I’ve decided to shave my head the day before as this feels like it’s a small bit of control I can have in this whole process. I’ve spent a lot of time looking for really nice head wear online and going to make an appointment at a wig shop soon to see what new look I can have - a new hairstyle every few days might even be fun and it’ll always look nice because you can style it before you even put it on! 

    I’m having a picc line put on later today and hopefully that’s the last procedure for a while - it’ll just be the chemo to concentrate on after that which I feel happy about (being poked and prodded has been exhausting as I’m sure you know)

    i wish I could be more helpful to you but im pretty new to all this as well. If you want to chat please reach out and I’ll be as much help as I can xx

  • Hi Sunflower18

    Welcome to the forum and I am sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer.  I was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer over three years ago and after having chemo, surgery and radiotherapy I made a full recovery.  I suggest that you join the breast cancer group as it tends to be much busier than this one and there are plenty of ladies with triple negative on there.  Here's the link to that forum: Breast cancer forum .  There is also a forum for ladies and gents under the age of  who have been diagnosed with breast cancer. Here's the link  to that forum as well: Breast cancer for the under-50s forum .

    I find it helpful to take things one day at a time and I also find getting out and about even if it's only for a short time helpful.  If there is a Maggie's centre or another cancer centre near you you can contact them.  They offer counselling and other therapies.

    Whatever you do don't google triple negative as the information on there is years out of date and you could end up going down a rabbit hole.  Rely on sites like this one and Breast Cancer Now for your information.

    Wishing you the best of luck with your treatment.

    Best wishes


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  • Hi Bumble bug

    Welcome to the forum and I am sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer.  You might find it useful to join the Breast Cancer forum as well Breast cancer forum as the breast cancer forum for the under 50s Breast cancer for the under-50s forum .

    Wishing you the best of luck with your treatment.

    Best wishes


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  • Hi bumble bug,

    I am really sorry to hear about your diagnosis, it’s never an easy thing or a word anyone wants to hear. sending you lots of love.

    i hope your appointment went okay and chemo isn’t too difficult. I am yet to get my appointment from the oncologist to find out my chemo pathway. 

    happy to chat further too, hope you managed to enjoy the weekend a little before all this unsteadiness. It’s so hard to get your head around things when things are moving so quickly but we’ve got this. 

  • Hi, I am 34 and I have also just been diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer. I have just started treatment . I went and got my hair cut short before treatment started and took control of it! Everyone is different and take it one day at a time! I’m here if you wish to talk. 

  • Hi ...

    Did you wait long? ... I was officially diagnosed on 26th March and my treatment starts on 15th May ... 24 weeks on chemotherapy and immunotherapy... I did have to have second biopsies as the first one in a lymph node came back inconclusive... It was then I was told invasive triple negative breast cancer ... I'm 64 years.

    My oncologist said even now it's very hard to feel it, my only clue was spotting a slightly inverted nipple and arranged a mammogram ... I was told then it was cancer .. 13th February ... I waiting has been horrendous... My nipple has disappeared now.

  • Morning Altogether,

    Really sorry to hear about your diagnosis, sending you lots of love.

    Are you on a similar treatment plan to me? I hope things are going okay for you. it's a very scary time but we WILL get through this x x

  • Hi Altogether

    Welcome to the forum and  I am sorry to heart that you have been diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer.

    Wishing you the best of luck with your treatment.

    Best wishes


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  • Hey again :) 

    picc line went absolutely fine thanks. I was so so worried about it but it wasn’t as bad as I had thought. Got my first chemo session tomorrow - don’t really know how I’m supposed to feel about it? I feel like I “should” be scared but I feel relieved it’s getting going. I think maybe that’s because everything up until now has been bad news and prep and now it’s finally time to start getting rid of it? I don’t know but it’s definitely a nicer feeling than all the worrying I’ve been doing since finding the lump in the first place.

    have you had any more tests or info about your plan going forward? If have any questions about tests and things I may have had, im more than happy to chat about them with you to help you through these times if you ever want to. 

    lots of love xx

  • Hi Altogether!

    How are you finding your treatment so far? I start chemo tomorrow and it can’t come quick enough! I shaved my head on Saturday and it felt good to do something which I had chosen to do and not what I was told to do - very freeing.