Hi. Just saying hello and thank you for this forum. My husband 60 had a PSA test 5.5, PRADs 4. Biopsy multiple Gleason 3+3 in all parts of prostrate. He’s opted for robotic surgery. Op is in May.
I’m worried about post op complications. My husband has decided he doesn’t want anyone to know his diagnosis so we are keeping it from our adult children. Im grateful to have somewhere to turn for support.
About half an hour ago I decided to write a note for OH so he’d know what was going on and what the surgeon said if he woke up. I’m not sure if anyone in itu speaks English and he isn’t confident with Spanish. Surprisingly they let me in to see him and leave the note. He’s still asleep but opened his eyes briefly when I held his hand. He’s rigged up to a lot of monitors and has tubes and drips plus a tube in his mouth. It’s upsetting to see but I’m sure when I go back later they’ll have removed the mouth one. Poc a poc the nurse said to me. Ie little by little. I’m leaving him to rest and popped out to buy him a kindle. I also left him a lollipop 
. He definitely deserves one 
Hi AlwaysHope
Thankyou very much for your message and the link re penile rehabilitation. I’ve downloaded it and will read it today. I know it’s important OH takes steps to get things moving again. Having said that, at the moment I’m having to drip feed him little bits of information. This sounds as if I’m treating him like a child, which I definitely am not, only that if I say anything about the ins and outs of what his op involved or anything else he says ‘don’t tell me, don’t tell me!’. He’s coping amazingly well and taking in the info he feels he needs bit by bit. I read all I could and over the past few weeks, every now and then he’d ask a question, hear the answer and then say ‘that’s enough for now’. It’s his way of dealing with things and that’s fine. An example being in ITU yesterday when we asked me why his penis feels sore. I said it’s probably the catheter. He looked horrified and said ‘what it’s in there?!’. I said well where did you think it was going? He said he’d thought they’d bypass his manhood or something! 
He couldn’t contemplate it being in his penis so probably it was better he wasn’t worrying about that for weeks beforehand. He’s stuck with it for 10 days now, something I gently told him last night. He’ll get his head around it, as he’s done with all the other things that were uncontemplatable just a few weeks ago. He said he’d rather take his chances than risk urinary incontinence and ED, but now he’s done the op. I’m very very proud of his bravery!
