Erectile dysfunction

Hello Godbless, the many replies show that you are not alone in this. We have been married for 50+ years and, although treatment was completed last year, the ED persists but my husband has recovered the ‘desire’. He is finding this very upsetting and the nhs pump is not proving successful for us as a couple. He can’t have the viagra type drugs and goes quite pale at the thought of injections! We seem to have little option!

however, what really upsets me is his upset at what he terms ‘another failure’. It really bothers him and he is worrying more and more and, so, in some sort of psychological/ physical vicious cycle. I have continually told him that it’s more important to me that he is here at my side and that he’s ‘ more than just a penis’. So, we continue to kiss and cuddle and enjoy each others company and hope that the treatment has meant we will be together for a long while yet.  

Pardon for the pun but I am  ‘greatful for small mercies’.

i do think that, in a relationship, intimacy is important but that intimacy can happen without complete sexual intercourse and we just have to accept that. From a wife’s point of view, there’s so much more to a relationship. I know my husband doesn’t share this opinion and has said he feels ‘less of a man’. For me, he is more of a man for having fought his way through this disease and his other health problems.

So, not much help , I think, for you but perhaps another way of considering your situation?