PSA 210

Hello Georgina (Gena7) 

Yes I remember now and I have just re-read Eddie's profile. You are stuck in the middle here and I feel sorry for you, you want to help, but he doesn't want treatment.

It's a bit above my pay grade!! (i don't get paid as a volunteer!). You say he has Alzheimer's - does he have mental capacity? If so is he willing to  a) If he was told by the Consultant he needed the tests to see how he was would he have them? b) Would he listen to the Consultant who could explain the consequences of refusing tests and treatment. c) Would written information he can read be of assistance? d) If he didn't want treatment for the cancer, treatment is available to help both his bowels and flow.

A PSA of 210 would also indicate he's "treatable" as opposed to "curable" but that's what the investigations are there to find out.

Just my thoughts - others may have some ideas - lets hope between us we can find an answer.

Best wishes - Brian.

Hi Gena and sorry to hear.

I think having Alzheimer's makes it worse because does affect your thinking although I don't know how far advanced the Alzheimer's is.

Speaking negatively perhaps it has got to the stage where u can do no more especially if he refuses treatment .

Not sure if he has been having hormone therapy because that can hold the cancer back for some time.

I think that any other kind of treatment would be too problematic.

Just my thoughts, sorry not much positive.

Perhaps others can put some more positive comments 

Best wishes 

Steve 

Hi Gena7,

What a conundrum for you to face which puts you in a very difficult situation where there is no easy answer for a resolution. 

Do you have any children, family or friends that are close to your husband who could try & explain the situation to him & maybe at least get him to agree to having the tests?  Sometimes it can be easier to accept information from someone slightly removed from the situation.  Apart from that I can't think of much more to suggest that Millibob & Grundo have already covered.

Sending you a huge virtual hug at this difficult time.

Best wishes

Brian

Hi Gena (Gena7 ), what a tricky situation you are in with Eddie.  I think Buzzers made a really good suggestion about involving others, that is, if you can get him to see the consultant in the first place. Wishing you good luck and virtual hugs.  David

Hi . I personally don’t think he has the mental capacity of making decisions .  BUT when you said if the consultant tells him straight the consequences of NOT  facing it … he might just listen . But when the consultant told him on the first visit … he ended up leaning over his desk and looked him in the face telling him he had cancer .. “ do you understand “ he just said nothing wrong with me . My daughter plays bad cop ..  (as she can go home ) and tricks him by saying we are all going out for lunch … then when we get near the hospital she says we’ve just got to pop in here and she texts the nurse to say we’re at the hospital… so he’s seen straight away .  And the consultant wants bloods again another bone scan and full body scan. He didn’t kick off last time … so we are hoping for the same .But treatment no .. Weare briinging tve big guns out now and Our grandaughter saidshe is coming  and hopefully ...but with his alzimers Everything is doubly difficult. Over the years we have spoken about cancer and Alzheimer’s as family have been there ..  and he said back then he wouldn’t want to know ..  and would end it all if he was ever told … and I do believe he would .. . Thankyou for your thoughts and advice . I appreciate it . Gena 

I’m hoping we haven’t reached that stage … but you could be right… 

Hi Steve you could be right . And we ( daughter and myself) talked about the hormone treatment … but it was pointed out to us it could speed up the Alzheimer’s and make him aggressive… so decided against that . 
thankyou Gena 

Ok Gena

One more question,  what does he say is the reason for not wanting the treatment and what does he say about the fact that the PC can only get worse without any treatment.

Steve 

Hello Georgina. I see that you have a real dilemma and can remember that you said Eddie has Anosognosia which is making it difficult for you to know how best to handle things. How would he react if you said that you would like help him with his bowel issues and think that some scans might get to the 'bottom' of things. That way there is no mention of cancer and it is something that he is aware of himself. With his PSA things are happening and hormone therapy is most likely to be recommended which can either be by tablets or injections but that raises the dilemma of worsening the Alzheimer's and how to get the drugs into him. Does he go for the flu or COVID jabs as it could be phrased in terms of preventative medicine like these ones. I think you need a conversation with the oncologist about prognosis without treatment so that you know where you stand.

I am sending you a big hug and look after yourself.

Hi , well to be honest ,,, we never discussed  that ,,, mainly because of his Alzimers ,,,( he doesn’t know about that either )   mainly because he has this tough exterior,,,, nothing can harm me outlook , but inside he’s a very emotional sensitive man,,,,and when I had cancer 4 years ago,,,, he said  your braver than me ,,, I couldn’t deal with that , and when family have had cancer ,,,, he’s said he wouldn’t want to know ,,,,  .,,,,, so  apart from when he was first told by the consultant it’s never been talked about ,he  had his 2nd round of scans last October and his PSA in march was about 120:,,My honest opinion is I don’t think he could face up to it all ,and the Alzimers doesn’t help,,,,Thankyou Gena .