Advice please

Fleabane, I did much the same as you! I had to have everything pretty much perfect before I felt ready to bite the bullet on my 2.7cm that was first spotted two years ago! I hadn't thought consciously about the fact that what I was telling myself were "excuses", was actually an important part of my feeling in control!! I had to make sure the flood at home from last summer's water leak, the broken flashing on the roof, the non-functioning boiler thermostat, my two dogs having care (they are rescues and both have 'special needs') was all sorted out to my satisfaction. I live alone and knew I wouldn't be allowed to do things like changing my bed, hauling the washing machine back on its plinth after a heavy spin cycle, bending double to reach under the cupboard to turn the switch on for the electric oven, for a while after surgery. I am very independent so wouldn't dream of calling my neighbour in just to flick a switch for me, for example. So I love your expression "making a nest"! - that's just what I was doing, over a period of time and latterly the extra things like fishing out a pile of books and DVDs that I haven't yet read, and putting them in one very accessible place. 

It feels great to be in control of something that technically we have no control over, doesn't it!

Hiya sweetheart good to hear ur in a better place. I know we all have good and bad days but taking control non the good days gives us comfort to rest on the bad days.

I haven't spring cleaned my house for 18 months. Just do the basics, toilet, bed change, vacuum, washing...and for once in my life the other jobs don't matter. 

I make my jobs list each day. If it gets done, that's brilliant. If not it really doesn't matter.

I see people on here who like to travel. They do so in their own limitations.

I have a border collie puppy...some days she doesn't get her walk because I am not feeling strong enough. She has been amazing. She never misbehaves through boredom. Stuff i do in the house I try to include her. For example she likes to empty the washing machine and tumble dryer.  OK she puts it on the floor. But she gets thrilled at helping me.

She also knows when I need to nap and she will settle with me.

So Maite enjoy ur nest, enjoy each day good or bad.

Our lives are different now and to be honest being made to slow down has been very good for me...

Hugest hugs  

Hi Muvva,

Mine was 2.7cm. One later scan said 2.6 cm but we figured that might be the angle of the scan or something! as I doubt it had actually shrunk a millimetre.

I've been under active surveillance since April 2023. I had a total hysterectomy that month for endometrial cancer (low grade, low stage) and the kidney lesion was seen on a pre-surgery scan. So every six months I pottered along to radiology and had my scan, and afterwards my consultant would ask me where I was at with my decision, as the two viable options were wait and see, or a partial. He took me off the list one time but then I asked at the turn of the year to go back on it. I'm only 64 and very fit and healthy (BMI 32 however, but I mean other than that!) so he wasn't considering it urgent as he said each time, "reassuringly it hasn't grown or changed in any visible way since your last scan".

I finally bit the bullet at the optimal time and as Fleabane described below, when I subconsciously knew I had maximum control over things without knowingly compromising my health in the process. I hadn't even thought about the fact that I was giving myself control over the uncontrollable, and it feels good to know that I actually was!

I had a partial just over a week ago and am relieved that I now no longer have it hanging over me that this was going to need doing "at some stage". Ok I maybe could have left it a further two years and then if it had grown into 4cm or more, I would have been kicking myself for not having had it done at 2.7cm! 

In my experience, at least with my consultant, once you are in the system they will try and keep tabs on you. I was in the mind-frame at one stage where I wanted to just forget it completely and carry on in blissful ignorance until it killed me 10 years down the line!! But my consultant kept having six-monthly scan appointments sent to me!! Because I knew he was still on the ball and hadn't forgotten me, I figured the least I could do was to not throw in the towel, and make his concern lead to a positive outcome. I only wanted to get on with my life and forget about that little lesion inside me which I wouldn't even have known about for maybe another ten years until it had grown huge. 

In the event, I now KNOW I can get on with my life, having had it taken out. The relief is almost impalpable! 

As an aside, do you have any tips for weight loss? I would absolutely love to lose even half a stone! but despite eating healthier than ever for at least two years, I am still exactly the same weight I was two years ago!! I don't eat ready meals, eat very little chocolate these days, have reduced my cheese intake drastically. I eat full fat everything but in strict moderation. I never eat low fat anything as those are full of sugars and guar gums and carrogen or whatever, and I figure my UPF intake is around 30% max, compared with the general adult population apparently consuming 60% of diet in UPFs. I eat half a plate of veg, very little meat or fish, and very little carbs. (hardly any bread, very little potato and a handful or two of pasta about once a week) I am starting to think that all my veggies are together amounting to a lot of calories (I mean, there are calories in spinach and cabbage and peas and broccoli, so maybe I'm just eating too many of them) - I cannot cut out the things that I already don't eat and haven't eaten for a long time, so maybe I just have to train my stomach to shrink a little by eating a smaller portion of each of my veg? It's just a bit frustrating!!

I hope you have had some joy now with your appointments. It does seem from your later updates that somehow you had 'dropped off' a list. It does happen. I had a similar experience in the opposite way when they suddenly fished up an address for me that I haven't used for around 20 years!! and was in a totally different health authority at the other end of the country. I figured they must have been correlating paper or older computerised records and somehow put it all together on their updated latest system and it didn't flag up the anomaly!!

The weight thing....have u had bloods done for your thyroid...just a thought...my thyroid bloods kept coming back normal..but a scan showed some goitres.. I then visited an endocrine specialist who delved deeper..I have a mixture of both hypo and hyper....

This is helpful to know because when I start my treatment it will be looked at

If not thyroid look at other conditions that may be keeping ur weight up, for example menopause 

Hugs  

Thanks, Fleabane!

I cannot honestly say I haven't been in a good place throughout. I am always a positive person anyway but had never thought about losing my health - first time ever was two years ago when I suddenly got landed with endometrial cancer. If anything, that was worse as firstly I was told on the phone by a GP as I was walking up to town alone to do my Christmas shopping, that it was likely I had cancer! That was even before any scans and after just one blood test. So from that point on I was kind of in denial but also I then started grieving the loss of my 62 years of near-perfect health! When I explained that grief to my kidney nurse last autumn, she said that was an interesting but obviously useful to me way of looking at it! So, I dealt with that, worked through my health grief, and then almost lost my nerve over going all through my second ever surgery again. 

I feel very fortunate to have had a low grade low stage first cancer and now possibly also a low grade low stage second cancer. My parents both had cancers. So it's obviously in the family. I just would rather have waited another few years until I was perhaps over 70, had retired, and had done a little bit more travelling and living. But what is, is, and many on this forum haven't even had 62 years of perfect health, sometimes not even 42 years! So, I do count my blessings.

I did chuckle at your puppy!! You have a good little assistance dog in the making there, bless her!

I confess I never clean a lot anyway. There's only me and the Girls and they don't notice if their home isn't cleaned to human standards, so it's a case of keeping surfaces clean, hoovering their black hairs a few times a week off my green carpet, doing the basics necessary for hygiene reasons, and the occasional mini-binge at turning out some of the clutter in my spare room to send to charity - and that's about the extent of my cleaning schedule, ever! I have always felt that there are better things to do in life than housework and as long as my dogs don't mind, and I do a mini-binge for the infrequent visitors I have round, the rest of it can go hang! 

I haven't yet been diagnosed as such with cancer. That will show up presumably with the histology. My consultant said it was a Bosniak 4 which carries an 85-90% chance of being sinister. I researched this in great depth once I found this much out. Read lots of research papers etc and tried to piece everything together from all the studies. Because I had had endometrial cancer already and because I have realised that my parents' cancers have indicated that I too have a propensity towards getting it, I am not gambling on that 10-15% chance of this being benign. Indeed, I won't know whether to rejoice and throw a party if it turns out to be, or whether to sit down and cry for the 15% loss of kidney function I have suffered all for nothing!!! - but I am not expecting it to be benign and barely know how I will react in the slim chance that it is! 

I was already slowing down at work. Used to do 36 hours a week. Now since last year I've been doing 20 hours. In 18 months when I draw my state pension I plan to reduce further to 12 or maybe even 8 hours a week. This has made little difference to how much I value my down time...walking my Girls, sitting on my swing bench in my small garden in the sunshine, or walking up the hill and smelling the air and the flowers while my Girls have sniff-time, and feeling the breeze coming across the fields and the panorama across the valley to the hills opposite, and the birds and all their different songs at different times of day and evening....some of this I cannot do again just yet until healed, but these are some of my joys in life and I already appreciated them and have done for a long time. I have lived for many years focusing on enjoying the moment, as my dogs do, so health issues are not really making me learn to do so but merely emphasising that I have been living in the best frame of mind already for a long time!

I am a great believer in the type of thought that says that what is thrown at us in life, makes us stronger. And that we are not given anything that we are not strong enough to cope with. It's all a challenge. I am not a gambler (that 10% chance!) but I am always up for a challenge. Many on here are being challenged way more even than I am, yet all seem to be working with their challenges and becoming stronger as a result. It is life-changing, in either a small way or more likely even in a bigger way. 

No I haven't actually. I have a friend and her daughter who both have thyroid problems but they have other visible signs of this that I don't have, apart from the weight thing. 

I am a bit nervous atm of all these bloods and have twice been called for my annual health check which was due last June! and haven't gone for it as I am sick of blood tests and stuff, and now most of it has been covered anyway by tests done around this recent surgery: cholesterol (normal range), blood sugars (well below pre-diabetes) amongst others. I haven't however been tested for thyroid but not sure if I want an extra health issue to cope with on top of this current one. I don't "do" medications so for me, finding out I might have a problem probably wouldn't help as I wouldn't take the medication for it unless I was so ill I was forced to. 

I know it has something to do with menopause as I didn't realise I was going through it due to almost no symptoms, and the weight crept on very gradually over several years. What I didn't know years ago was that what we eat in our 20s and 30s can store up problems for our body once we pass menopause. In my 20s I could never put on weight, and at 7 1/2 stone I would deliberately eat the highest fat yogurts, several chocolate bars a day and several bags of crisps, on purpose to try and put on weight as I knew I was a bit too skinny. And I still never managed to put on as much as a pound! so I just kept on eating all the wrong things! I changed my outlook a bit in my 40s once I surpassed the 8 stone mark and still not realising I was in peri-menopause, but it wasn't really until about 5 years ago, when the damage was well and truly done years before, that I completely changed my diet to a thoroughly healthy one. But now, whilst I don't put any on, I cannot get any off either! 

IF I get the all-clear on the histology for this, I may then feel able to go and get thyroid-tested. I am not used to not being healthy and don't feel I can deal with more than one thing at once atm. Even if I get a low grade stage diagnosis, I will consider a thyroid test - even if I am told it's medication or nothing and I choose to not take the meds, at least I would have a reason for this weight thing. 

Hello maite and fleabane

I'm waiting for a referral in another town as I've elected the robot.the positioning of the so and so is that laparascopically can't be done to part remove it, unless I opt for a radical which isn't my choice.

I already had the biopsy and the so and so is the slow growing type.i like to be in control of my choice so it doesn't dictate to me.

Thyroid probs are definitely a reason for my weight however I've spent 9 months losing around 2 stone till a few months in and learnt more about the so and so.i am trying to make it a lifestyle change but I'm very slow at it.

Anyways, onwards and upwards ladies.the sun is shining.Enjoy your weekend.

Regards to all , wishing everyone well on their journey.

Muvva

Hiya Muvva

Good choice for surgery. I had the robot...the main incision is so small and healed quickly.

As for weight. I did put a lot on in my 40s but I had a full hysterectomy which didn't help. Plus I was a big wine drinker.

Then diabetes hit me. I found drinking wine just hurt my tummy so I gave it up.

I can say I am ideal weight. I did lose alot for no reason about 2 years ago. Told it was my diabetes but turned out to be my cancer.

I looked fault and didn't like being slim. After the nephrectomy I put a little back on but won't let myself over or under 10 half stone now.

I do have an awful appetite though 

So my thought is as long as u are healthy enough for the surgery and not infirm because of your weight i wouldnt bear yourself up. However well done for your weight loss, that's amazing.

( u do need to walk I started 10 mins a day, to help ur body recover, get rid of toxins and look after your heart)

Well sorry for babbling on. Was just having a break ..doing the ironing..yuk..

So yes onward and upward

Thank you for your post.i appreciate your message.

How long do you think I should have to wait to be referred in another town.

I'm making a concerted effort with my weight in the meantime to help myself hopefully.health issues, thyroid and double mastectomy, 

Aren't you good ironing?

All the best

Do u know what hospital u r being referred to?

If u know where and which department for example renal.. I would give it a week or two then ring and ask for that department. 

Just check ur referral has gone through. You'll note administration is terrible and most people have to be proactive

Mine hadn't but I had a letter from the old hospital saying he was going to refer me.

This was enough fo the  new hospital, I emailed the copy. 

This done I was then on the list to see new consultant. Things moved quite quickly for my appointment 

My other advice is to make a file to take with you. Make sure it has letters, results etc from your other health issues. This saves a lot of time.

If u haven't got stuff like that speak to your GP for copies.

I HATE IRONING ..but my pyjamas are the type that need ironing... 

Oh i forgot..fill in your profile..it helps others get to know you and also helps u not having to repeat yourself..u just say look at my profile..