Having a bad day

Hello Yantibee

I am so full of admiration for your actions towards your MIL and Jill's family. Although I think you were right to take a stand about Jills funeral, because that had to be about her and your feelings for her, it is wonderful that you have found it in your heart to forgive her mother now, and to demonstrate that.

We see so many sad, fractured families, where resentment and hatred build up in a poisonous self reinforcing cycle. You have just shown that you can cut the knot, with goodwill.

I hope that your actions give you all some much deserved solace

XxxNiobe

Oh please make this stop.

Jx

Sue hugging you x

Hi Jenny,

Just wish we could. If wishes had power ......

Love to you, your mum and dad.

Xxx

If only.

Nurse just turned the bloody light on for another patient who said no no too bright. Got side light now.

So annoying. ..

Jenny, I bet the inside of your cheek is really sore from biting to stop speaking your mind. 

I wish ..... that medical staff could live a day, a week, a month, a year ...in the life of a patient, a carer .. can't happen I know, and I know that until bob and I were going through this we truly didn't know,  understand, empathise with  how bad things could get/be.

Love and hugs

Had a really crappy week.  Mum is not good.  She just can't keep her eyes open. She's eating and drinking even less.  Can't really understand what she's saying anymore.  She's so weak.  I too just want this to end.

Jenny, I'm right there with you holding your hand.

Yantibee,  you are a bigger person than I think I could be in that situation and I am full of admiration for you.  You did the right thing and Jill would be proud of you and your boys.

Sue, I'm sending you a big hug.

Maisiemae, you've done what you can for your brother but perhaps it's time to draw a line under that.  You need to think about yourself for a while.  You did so much for your mum and now you need to concentrate on you.

Bobles, good luck with your MIL, she sounds 'interesting...' You're a better woman than I.

X

Hello all,

Just to let you know I am still following your posts, and really feel for each and every one of you, it reminds me so much of how I was with my Mum. You are all going through such a horrible time, but, believe me, you are amazing! I am going through similar with my Dad now, but it is very different. He is a Chelsea Pensioner, and lives in the Royal Hospital, Chelsea, 100 mls away, but I am happy with that, because I know he will get the best care, and I am no longer in a position to nurse him, or anyone! Just a funny story (sometimes we need this to lift our spirits). I have been trying to attend all his cancer appointments, at the Royal Marsden, so on wednesday he said he had one, a follow up after his radiotherapy 3 months ago. Went there on train ( I won't drive in London, far too scary for me! We were taken by a private ambulance to to the hospital, and I immediately said it's not the Marsden, it was the Brompton, and my Dad said, whoops, I made a mistake! It was to check his pacemaker ( or so I thought ). It was not a wasted journey, though, as I found out his pacemaker wasn't a pacemaker, just a heart monitor. Anyway it was quite amusing, but all ended well.

Take care all, Anneteresa

Hi Anneteresa,

How are you doing?  Can't say I blame you for not wanting to drive in London.  I work up there and cycle from Liverpool Street to work every day.  Traffic is always really bad and can be a bit hair raising at times.  Glad that most of my journey is on the cycle highways. How old is your dad?  How is he coping with it all?   It's good that you can get to his appointments with him.

X

Hi everyone 

Jill's mum died on Friday morning . Wow . Head spinning emotions all over the place youngest son devastated for his loss of his grandma and confused due to the break down in her relationship with Jill it's just a mess a huge mess. 

Went to the hospital Friday morning when I heard . Jill's sister was the main reason I went along with the fact my youngest rang me to say he was going up so I had to go be there for him . Everyone saying "oh you are so strong" and " you don't need this on top of everything else" but Jill would have been there for them, her family, even though all the bad stuff she kept going back to give more of herself. 

Things can't get much worse although I am scared to think that at the moment , and the dog is really not well!!! I think when poppy dies that will open the floodgates of grief I honestly do! How sad is that? It's like I need the whole death in the family thing to complete before I can face what's happened or maybe I am talking rubbish I don't know. 

All things said it's been awful this year and last year and I wish it would stop for me my kids my family and all you loving kind generations people out there. I feel like a child to say it but it's just not fair , no reason no explanation just this is how it is so there you go and it's not fair 

MIL in hospital mortuary until Monday at least due to red tape can't be released to FD over a weekend as no doctor to sign death notice? Really?!? And eldest brother in law ( pretty good) was there last night before she passed but said he HAD to go work on Friday even with his mother in her last hours of life. He did go and he was not there when she died ! Disbelief from me I held it in but cannot get my head round why you would go drive a lorry rather than be with your mum in her last moments . Anyway he broke down ( mechanically speaking) in a lay by in Leek and had to wait to be towed home KARMA  !! NOB . 

Eldest son in Holland a mess ......nightmare x